Full Metal Panic Mission: Bravo Alpha Bravo Yankee
by EisleyFyer
Summary: A story with a little bit of everything, fluff, lemon, spoilers. What happens when the final battle of Mithril and Amalgam has begun? Who will win? Who will loose? What will the cost be? What happens after it's over? Rated M for explicit content.
1. Chapter 1

Authors Note~ I DO NOT OWN FULL METAL PANIC OR ANY OF THE INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY OF **Shoji Gatoh**

Full Metal Panic! Operation Bravo Alpha Bravo Yankee

Sousuke looked around his living quarters on the Tuatha De Danaan with the legal documents spread across his cot. This would be the last time he would have a chance to do this. Writing down his possessions in a pragmatic, concise list, was not a problem. It was what to do with his possessions that was the real question. He had no family to speak of and nothing of value besides the money he's earned being a mercenary of which he has used little.

Nami.

He would rebuild the school in that small village in her memory.

_-It's the least I can do._

Chidori...

If she was still alive after this was over...

If he couldn't be there to protect her...

He could at least provide for her...

It was a clear solution. If she were still alive after this battle, and he was not, she would become the beneficiary of his estate. She was the closest thing to family outside of the crew of the De Danaan he had ever came the particularly hard part for Sousuke, what to say to his friends, commrades, aquanitinces and so forth. What would he talk about? His life? Justice? What kind of man he was? Nothing good came to mind. As far as he was concerned he had caused just as much pain in the world, if not more, than others. He danced with the flames of fate and constantly found himself on the edge of getting burned, and this time, he thought, he would be consumed by them. There was only one thing he could think of to write:

Good Luck.

At this he closed the documents and filed away the papers.

_Chidori..._

The thought of her kept his hand still on a piece of blank paper.

_-I'm not any good at expressing myself in words, but maybe if I can write down these thoughts to her I can steel my nerves before the final battle. _

Somehow became normal for them to talk candidly during some crisis, incident, or under pressure. Did it mean they relied on the peril itself to be honest with their feelings? If he were to meet and talk to her again, would it be under the same circumstances? He couldn't even begin to guess. To begin with, she had now lost her sanity. She thought she was acting according to her convictions, while in fact she was being manipulated by the consciousness of that girl in the TAROS. Even Tessa did not know any way to turn her back. Was it too late already? Would she never go back to the girl he knew? Wasn't what he was about to do completely futile and meaningless?

-This is a bad idea but then again...

At that thought he took a pen from his pocket and began to swiftly write, finding the words coming more freely than he had ever anticipated he found himself filling the front and back of the first sheet of paper. Several sheets later he felt like he had spilled his soul and lifeblood into every word of that letter. She would probably never get the chance to read it, but it felt good to get everything out. He folded the paper and slipped it into an envelope writing "Angel" on the front and placing it into the manila envelope with the rest of his will. A lithe shadow then envelops the dim light coming from the doorway when Mao enters the small berraks.

Souske remained silent ruminating on what he had written.

-Hey there Sergeant Serious. What are you doing?

-Getting my affaris in order.

-Your affaris? Like your will?

-I figured this may be my only chance. There's not much to sort out anyways since I don't have any family.

-So what are you going to do?

-I'm giving it all to her if she survives.

-You're a very kind person, you know. Someone like you shouldn't even have become a soldier.

-Me? You're making a big deal out of nothing.

-I'm not Sousuke you've got a gentle soul that was thrown into this world of war.

-I'm a mercenary as much as you are.

-No. You just learned the skills necessary for your survival. You shouldn't have ever had to hold a gun, kill to eek by, even learning to pilot that damn robot. Me? Clouseau? We're here by choice, and you're not, - Mao's voice shook lightly as she then paused.

-Look... I'd like to ask you something. No... it's not a question it's an order.

- Yes?

- Please. When this is all over, stop it. Don't do it anymore. Forget about good-for-nothings like us, just live for yourself. Don't ever take up a gun again. Be kind to people, laugh with them, go back to school, be a normal kid while you still have the chance.

She then turned him around and wrapped him in a warm sisterly embrace.

- You can live like that, I know it...

She tilted her head to the side and looked straight into his eyes, tears welling up in the corners. She had lost so much and so many since this started and she didn't want Sousuke to end up dying in vain like the rest of them.

- Impossible.

Those words shook her out of her revere.

- Don't say that. Don't say things that would make Kaname sad...

- Kaname...?

- You have to save her and let her know that everything's going to be alright.

Sousuke couldn't think of anything to say. If she was here, then he probably wouldn't be feeling this way, and would believe her if she said that everything's all right. But then, who would say that to Mao now that Weber was gone? He tentitively put his arms around her back and whispered.

-He would be proud of you Mao. He loved you.

She sniffled and pulled back to look Sousuke dead in the eye.

-No pressure, but it's up to you to save her.

-Affirmative.

At that Melissa pats him on the shoulders and heads towards the hangar. The final battle will be commencing soon and then they will have to part ways. This may be the last time he meets with Mao so he stops her forcefully and looks her straight in the eyes.

- I also have an order.

- What you can't order me?

- Then think of it as a promise between commrades in arms.

- Then what's that Sousuke?

-Never give up. Never give in. Believe in me.

He gripped her shoulder at this and gave her an akward smile. Trying to cheer her up was harder than he anticipated, but at the last she gave him a big punch in the shoulder and with a big grin said:

- I won't die that easily!

- Roger!


	2. Chapter 2

She had been working at a feverish pace to finish since arriving at Merida Island from Yamsk-11 to complete the TARTAROS. It was her mission, and the only thing that made sense anymore. She had killed Sousuke and Tessa in cold blood and she was going to now rewrite history, how it should have been, before the appearance of the Whispered. Looking over the advanced logarithms and making minute calculations and changes to the software of the program that would ultimately change the course of human exsistance was exhausting. She hadn't slept or washed for 3 days now and it was showing. The enemy was on its way and she knew she had to finish before they arrived.

- Aah, what's wrong with me?

She felt her lids growing heavy and felt her energy dispensing very quickly and very suddenly. This feeling... it was as if someone, somewhere, was constantly yelling at her, and protesting against

everything she did. Like someone was struggling to be heard over a din of calculations, thoughts, and information, but how could that be? She was doing this knowing completely what the outcome would be. Someone had to put an end to all of this and she was the one who definitely could.

As she was musing all of this she glanced at one of the 3 screens she was using to find something very odd.

-/anta ha atasi jya nai;

Romanji? Who could have written such a thing? Surely it was just a mistake from overwork, exhaustion, and lack of nutrition? She shook her head again. She began to feel like she was forgetting something very very important, but what it was she just couldn't put her finger on. Why did she have that feeling? She couldn't be anyone but herself. She thought and acted by her own will. And she was doing the right thing. Even so, doubts constantly emerged out of nowhere, and stirred her heart. She felt the hot pricking of unshed tears just about then, when Leonard came striding into the Control Room.

-They will be here soon my love, will it be ready in time?

-Yes it will Leonard.

He took her and and placed a small kiss on her knuckles, she did not object. It was late (or early?) and she was tired. A thought crossed her mind when she felt the warmth of his lips on her cold hand.

-_Maybe it's time to reward my subordinate._

Her former self would have never allowed such a thought to entertain her mind. She would obstinately rejected him and probably would have been reprimanded in some way, but today was different. She thought it would be truly pitiful, if he had to leave this world like that.

-_Why not tonight then?_

She looks deep into his eyes and he begins tracing small kisses down her arm to her neck and finally...

-STOP!

A voice? No it was herself.


	3. Chapter 3

It was time to depart the time for analysis was over.

- We are currently performing emergency surfacing. The flight deck will open as soon as we're up, and once you get launched, we're diving again. As planned, the cleaning up on the island's left to you.

- Roger.

He checked the status of the machine. The control linkages that had been giving errors were still not

operational. Sousuke gave up and stopped the tests - the auxiliary system seemed to be failing every time. This meant that he couldn't do much but pray that the master system would not be damaged, and that the auxiliary system wouldn't be needed. This was a bad omen, but all he could do was prepare. He climbed briskly into the cockpit of Laevatein and began to mentally steady himself for what was about to happen. After being catapulted off of the flight deck the first thing Laevatein sensed was 12 anti-air missiles shot out of 3 overwhelmingly huge Behemoth.

It was not easy to evade a modern anti-air missile, and besides, they weren't exactly a fighter jet to

begin with. With this craft, a poorly executed high-G turn meant that they would either stall, or their

wings would come off, which would mean a crash in any case. They had no electronic warfare suite to

speak of. The twelve missiles were approaching fast.

Thirty-five seconds to impact...

-Shit! I need some options AL!

There were 8 missiles closing in on him and no proper way to maneuver away from or rebuke them.

-Looks like we're gonna have to take them head on!

Sousuke is resolute and Laevatein is complying with his orders. One 76mm Boxer shotgun in each hand, one GEC-B 40mm assault rifle in each sub-arm, and two GAU-19 12.7mm Gatling guns in the head of the machine. He was going to intercept the incoming missiles with all eight guns. And if something got through, he would have no choice but to try and withstand the impact with the help of the Lambda Driver. The final battle was now officially underway. Only a few more seconds before impact...

-FIRE!

Sousuke shoots all 8 guns at once in three seconds they shot around 1,200 bullets at the targets, but because of the recoil it was hard to maintain position, speed and was on the verge of stalling but the system that Sax had equipped it with was keeping the Arm Slave moving forward. Four missiles left and no way to stop them...

-ACTIVATE THE LAMBDA DRIVER NOW!

Sousuke focuses all of his mind on forming a shield in front of himself, one strong enough to withstand the impact of the missiles with minimal damage. The air around the AS began to distort and he put up a hand as if to stop the missiles in their tracks. Upon reaching the barrier the remaining 4 missiles explode into fragments of flame and metal. Though he was able to protect the body of the AS the wings on the XL-3 were different.

-Damage report!

-Damage to left wing, soon flight will not be capable.

- Ready the Demolition Gun. Switch to Gun-Howitzer mode!

- Sergeant... are you joking?

It was obvious that he didn't believe what he heard, and asked again. The Demolition Gun, after all, was their main weapon - practically an artillery cannon, that could destroy a Behemoth in one shot. However, even on the ground, with the AS bracing itself, the recoil was extraordinary. Shooting that while in the air...

- Sergeant, the machine will fall apart.

- Don't worry about the recoil, just hurry!

- Roger.

He had also probably recognised that in this worsening situation, attack was the best defence, and did

not object to his orders again. This was going to be the fight of all fights and AL had some 'intuition' that this would be the last time they fought together like this, he did not like this 'feeling.'

- Sergeant? Can I have a moment?

- Kind of busy here AL!

- I'm afraid this will be the only opportunity I have to convey this.

- Make it quick!

- I won't let you down Sergeant Sagara!

Sousuke had to wonder at this, his ARX-8's AI was beyond anything that had ever been seen before in artificial intelligence. It was as if he was evolving, learning, feeling, growing, like a real human. He couldn't really understand it but somehow he knew that AL would never let him down, even if this place ended up being their grave.


	4. Chapter 4

Kaname was still deeply immersed in her work - she had barely noticed the fact that the ceiling of the control room slightly shook, and the structure's pillar creaked a little. There was probably a battle raging outside - still quite far, but its impact could already be felt. The enemy was on the island.

The structure that housed the TARTAROS was meant to withstand any kind of bombardment so she wasn't worried in the slightest. The machinery was also fitted with shock dampers, so measurement errors would be within acceptable parameters. As soon as the tremor from the explosion died, the sound of Kaname's typing filled the room once again. There was a sound from somewhere behind her that caused her to turn around and look. Leonard was in his pilot's uniform - he was going out in the Belial.

- Are you really going out there?

-There is no other choice, I have to take care of that nuscience before the problem gets out of hand.

- What's our chance of winning?

-90%

- It seems to me you may be underestimating yourself Leonard.

- Well even if there is a margin of error I believe we will succeed beyond anyone's origional idea. It's all thanks to you Chidori Kaname-san.

- I'm just doing what I consider to be the right course of action.

-I would like to meet you again when this is all over.

- Sure, in some peaceful town somewhere in a place far away from this hell we live in now. We can chat and be friends, I'm sure Tessa would be there too since you two are siblings. My mom, dad and Ayame would be there too of course.. plus my friends from school. Yes I think I would enjoy that very much. And this time I'll be able to find peace and happiness.

- Is 'he' going to be in this world that you create?

-'He?' who is he?

- Nobody important, I'll be going now.

- Yes. Goodluck Leonard and come back safe!

At this she raised a small smile to him and at the same time she felt like something terrible was going to happen. She knew that the likelihood that he would be defeated was slim to none, but apparently the man who piolted the Lavethian was skilled beyond belief. When the thought of the man crossed her mind the only thing she could think of was Sousuke. It was a strange feeling, not one of regret, or remorse but more of optimistic hope.

_-If he were still alive he might come to rescue me._

The thought of those feelings rose like bile in the back of her throat leaving a bitter taste. She did not want to remember the feelings of guilt that were still alive within her. She did not want to remember him, and avoided that painful memory of her farewell in those deep Siberian ruins. It was then that she heard a voice through the wireless communication sysytem.

_- ... Kaname! Chidori Kaname! Do you hear me? …calling ….open channel! If you can't answer just listen! I'll be coming for you right now!_

-Sousuke? - she whispered perplexed.

_- I've come to take you back! Do you hear me? Take you back! Back to your world! _

There could be no mistake. That was Sousuke.

_-What kind of thing is this? He's dead, isn't he? I'm certain, that time I shot him in the forehead. Why is Sousuke here? _

She felt indifferent to him being alive and the fact that he finally came for her, a sense bewilderment. And that same uncomfortable feeling within her grew stronger. Her vision became blurred, she couldn't read the characters on the nearby screen, she was half dressed and her thoughts became enumeral.

_- I tried to think of something nice to say, but I'm the same as usual, can't talk niceties, so listen close. I wanted to tell you, that I thought you had more guts. Do you hear that? _

What was that man saying? He was talking on an open circuit, so the whole island could hear him.

They would locate the source of the transmission, and their forces would intercept and trap him. However, that didn't stop him from talking. On the contrary, he sounded like he was fed up with everything and grumbling - she didn't remember him ever talking this way.

_- I'm serious, Kaname. I'm disappointed in you. I always thought you were a better person... no, that's not true, either. In fact, there were plenty of things that irritated me. You always hit people over the head, couldn't take an argument calmly; it often felt like you were preying on me, or trying to control me, and I got angry. You lived in your peaceful Japan, not knowing any real trouble, and didn't have the slightest bit of concern about me. Thinking about it now, that's just not fair. You were a cruel, cruel person... but that's not the most important thing. I just remembered it, and thought I'd tell it to you now, while I have the chance... so what I wanted to say is, does it look like you're the person I could throw away everything to save? In truth, I'm still thinking about it. I've been chasing you for a year, and was frustrated many, many times. In Mexico and in Yamsk-11, I was this close, but it all failed because you were slow. Think of yourself as a princess, eh? You really didn't want to do it? You thought that it was all right either way? Don't tell me you're crying now, hearing me say this? Or did the stupid girl expect comforting words from some stupid military otaku? I've had enough Kaname, I''ll bring you home kicking and screaming if I have to, but what happens after that is your decision._

She couldn't believe what she was hearing. That man? Those harsh words? _THAT _was what he wanted to say? And then something abruptly changed her mind. That's some software they have there, able to recreate a dead person's voice. It was obviously a kind of psychological warfare. That feeling though, it kept welling up in her chest making her want to shout at him.

-Enough. Just stop it now Sousuke, or whoever you are.

Before she knew it she had picked up the headset and was speaking to him.

- It's really me! Sousuke Sagara!

-It doesn't matter if you are or not, the point is you loose. You're too late, I've completed everything for the launch of TARTAROS and will be creating a new and better world shortly, there is nothing you can do to stop me or to change my mind.

- I wasn't ever talking to you. I was talking to the REAL Chidori.

-What are you talking about? I am the real Kaname Chidori.

- You see now that's where you're wrong... SOFIA. He said with a jeer in his voice and a snarl on his lips.

-_Sofia? What is he talking about? She died a long time ago?_

_-_I don't know what you-

-I said shut up. You think I've come here to plead and negotiate with you? Feh- he laughed.

-I don't bargin with terrorists nor do I let them escape me. I came to be your worst nightmare and you of all people should know what I'm capable of, I've killed well over 100 men and by the time I'm through there will be nothing left of this place.

It was his declaration of war. The episo facto deciding moment to put everything he's got into this fight.

-You just don't understand the kind of world I'm going to create, one of peace and prosperity for all people. It will be harmonious and magnificent.

-Shut up bitch. I'm coming for you.

At the last he flipped off the open channel and scanned the vacinity for enemies.


	5. Chapter 5

The battle was progressing quickly. Assessing the situation he began to make his move on the enemy ASes. He knew the landscape of Merida Island like he knew the battlefields of the Middle East, therefore he had the upper hand . Moving fast, he started switching his weapons. First, the two Zeroes from the lower back. He let out a barrage of bullets into the dense jungle behind him. Several rounds of 20mm bullets ripped through the umbrage, decimated branches, and demolished several trees. Not paying any attention to the volley, the Codarls approached. The ESC the pilots of the Codarls were deemed unnecessary and they dispatched with the system immediately. They fired their carbines first. The Laevatein moved only a few steps to avoid their shots, and answered with its 40mm assault rifle. The simultaneous blasts of the assault rifle obliterated the first of the Codarls.

The second Codarl was approaching fast from a south-west direction and was headed towards him with guns blazing. He was going to show these bastards who had the better machine and who was the better pilot. With Gatling guns at the ready Sousuke unsympatheticaly riddled the next Codarl with from the other machine fell on his forcefield and disintegrated, and he dropped the now-empty 20mm Gatlings. He continued shooting at his enemy, emptying the magazine of his rifle, and charged. The enemy evidently had seen him coming, and started retreating with small jumps to the left and right, shooting back. The 37mm bullets whizzed past the Laevatein that ignored them. Its rifle had already run out of ammunition.

-More enemy heat signatures detected at 11 o'clock Sergeant.

-I know it already AL!

There were at least 8 more Codarls and Leonards Belial to deal with. The tatics they used were disgustingly clever and the only way out was to barrel through the barrage of enemy bullets. He was going to draw them out on the northwest side. He had one enemy pinned in his left hand, a shotgun in his right aiming for a second target and a third Codarl bearing down on him with a monomolecular spear.

- Cutter two!

_- Ready. _

The blade of a GRAW-4 monomolecular cutter sprang from the machine's knee, and started up. He barely managed to avoid the tip of the Codarl's spear, and from a seemingly impossible posture kicked the other machine. The enemy AS was skewered by the cutter blade protruding from the right knee in a shower of more enemy was shooting at him from another direction. He half-turned, using the enemy as a shield, and kicked it off. The skewered AS flew, like a discarded doll, turned and fell down, raising fountains of mud. Finally, he put his shotgun to the head of the machine that he had pinned down, and pressed the trigger, blowing it to little pieces.

He was a finely tuned machine working on all cylindars. Everything he had learned from every fight he had been in was coming into play, he felt invincible, even more so than the elusive Andri Kalinin. He knew exactly what his next move would be and how to counter the attacks. Having a long standing relationship with Kalinin was paying off, he was able to move unpredictably. Requesting back up from the TDD-1 firing 10 cruise missiles at almost a point blank range. With the addition of the "Fairy's Feather" he brought down 8 more units with minor dificulty. This was it. The final battle between the Belial and Laevatein's was quickly approaching . At the same time the perparations for the TARTAROS were almost completed, there was no time for hesitation and the time to attack was nigh.

-What's your next move Leonard?

He knew that the only thing Leonard had to do was to stall him for just long enough for the TARTAROS to start up.

-If I don't get to her before then...

He shook his head to get the confusing thoughts out. He smacked his lips and began his hunt for Leonard and the Belial. He remembered the message that Tessa had given him for Leonard, he vaguely wonderer if would have any effect on him at all. He took off for the base at full speed heading for elevator 16 whereupon he would find shaft 0 and be taken down into the belly of the facility. As elevator 16 came into view he also saw the form of an elegant machine, the Belial, holding what appears to be a bow.

_- I thought you'd come this far,_ - he heard Leonard's voice through the external speakers. _- Though I hoped they would hold out a little longer, with Kalinin in command. Turns out he's really too old for this. _

- Really. I think with you in command I'd be here in half the time.

_- You don't say,_ - the Belial moved its shoulders slightly, as if it was shrugging. _- I heard what you were _

_saying just a while ago. Pretty interesting... so you know she's Sofia? _

- Of course. Heard it from Tessa.

-Yes, Sofia - the girl whose heart and mind were lost during that experiment at Yamsk-11 eighteen years ago. This collection of residual thoughts is what Kaname was exposed to in the Omni-Sphere - Sofia herself had long ceased to exist. It wasn't a case of her personality taking over - no, the girl still thought of herself as Kaname, and while her intent was clear, all the memories of the past belonged to Kaname. This was the reason why it was futile to try and persuade her, or play on her past memories.

-I know Kaname Chidori and she wouldn't give up that easily.

-I grow weary of this idle chatter, shall we begin Sagara?


	6. Chapter 6

Opressed by the Belial the Laevatein was forced deeper into the facility. Near elevator nine of the third manoeuvring ground it fell into the shaft. He landed, smashed through the cage, leaping into the main tunnel. Somewhere straight ahead, at the end of this large tunnel, was the dry-dock, the TARTAROS - and Kaname. The strange sensation that he felt began to well up in his body. At first he believed his optical sensors were damaged or somehow misfunctioning. But then the de ja vu hit him like a ton of bricks, slamming his conscienceness in many different directionss at once. He was reliving the YAMSK-11 incident, there was Chidori with her harisen, hadn't he already been down this corridor? Events were flowing through time like rivers running to oceans, it was as if a flood gate of time had opened up and he was just an outsider observing things as they passed. He eventually saw glimpes of what appeared to be the future, running towards the TAROS but being too late. The monomolecular cutter of the enemy pierced through the cockpit.

This was what was going to happen in the very near future.

-_Sergeant Sagara! Look at the situation around you! Look at the clock! And get to your mission objective!_

It was the voice of his AI unit AL.

- The mission objective was to prevent the operation of TAROS and as it is right now its influence has already spread globally.

-It's not over yet AL. I promised them I'd bring her back and that's just what I intend to do.

All that he had to do was destroy the machine, break it by force if necessary. Even if his fight for the future was in vain, he would fight with all of his might to bring her back.

-_These are my feelings for you Kaname, let them reach._

As he began to open fire on the pipes, wires, and concrete a portion of the ceiling collapesed in front of him. The Belial was standing there defiantly, it was all that came between Sousuke and his ultimate goal.

-You didn't think I'd let you get away did you?

Leonard sneered.

-It's too late to stop it now, the process has already begun, soon this world will come to its perfect form. I can see it already, the innumberable possiblities of several worlds. Everything will be fine, she will fix it.

-Get out of my way.

Sousuke took a defiant step forward.

_- This world will soon be gone. It is the end. There will be perfect silence... if you also had a functioning _

_Lambda Driver, you would see it, too. It's a world without "before" or "after". This will all end very soon. Right after I kill you, it will all be finished, and everything will stop. _

He stepped forward again.

-AL?

-Sergeant?

-I'm sor...

-Don't mention it.

The head mounted machine guns only had one magazine left.


	7. Chapter 7

The small disruption didn't seem to have interrupeted her concentration as much as eased its way into her thoughts. It didn't seem to make a difference... at first.

She had started the change, and saw everything. She could not hear the whispers anymore - instead, she was the one whispering to the world. No, those were not whispers, but commands, that could be heard all across the globe. Her voice carried even to herself, before she was born.

_-Listen to my words... listen, remember, and do what you have to. This is the most important thing you can do. _

Her voice was the thread, and she weaved it to link the past and the present. She was fixing the very

fabric of time and space, that had become so repugnantly twisted...

_-And that isn't all. This will be a truly peaceful world, where no one had to be hurt. People would think _

_this isn't possible, but it is. If I can grasp the entire picture of cause and effect, and reach people's hearts... _

It would have to start when it all began, December 24, 1981.After that, ten years before today, the world would turn to a peaceful path, and for the next eight years she wouldn't even have to do anything. Everything would be all right. She begins creating possiblities-

_18 year old me, my younger sister Ayame, Mother, and Father are sitting together eating breakfast. I will be graduating this year and I'm off to school for my senior makes me a bento with all of my favorite dishes for the plane ride there. _

[Chidori... I thought you had more guts]

_I meet up with my best friend Kyoko and her boyfriend Ono-D. They are holding hands as they wait paitently in line for the plane. We chat about entrance exams and the colleges we will be attending next year._

[do you think you're some kind of princess?]

_Kyoko is taking pictures..._

[ you liar!]

The words of that man would not stop buzzing in her ears. The feeling of being split in two coursed through her whole body.

...wh-

….o- du-r?

The words were fuzzy at first but then they grew louder and incessant. A female voice.

-WHOM DID YOU CALL A LIAR!

The words came bursting forth as the real Kaname Chidori broke through.

- All I wanted was some words of encouragement like "Come on Chidori I know you can do it!" but WHAT do I get? 'You disappoint me?' and 'princess' and 'LIAR!' I can't believe you had the audacity to say 'BITCH'! I've been through a lot too ya know? And why do I have to be told this by some weird millitary otaku! I'm the one that's disappointed in this situation! Baka.

She needed to say those childish words. She needed to be the real Kaname Chidori.

- _She is?_

- _Then I am Sofia?_

What she just said was hysterical rambling. It wasn't logical, or morally sound, however, it was an

expression of her real feelings. She was like a child that would, in anger, throw himself on the floor and

start kicking and wailing. However, the important thing was that she was able to speak at all.

And it was all thanks to him.

-Sousuke...

While she was shouting, and slowly regaining consciousness, she understood his intention, that this result was what he hoped for. He had saved her, who was floating in an ocean of unconsciousness, in constant slumber. It was done in a very soldier-like way, though.

This is where the real fight for Kaname begins.

She's in a place out of space and time itself in a world of pre-exsistence where anything was possible.

-Shall we introduce ourselves? She offered.

Sofia appeanced mocked that of Kaname, but you could tell these were to seperate people by their countents.

-It's already started. Why don't we finalize it together?

-No.

-Why?

-I like my world the way it is, I don't want it to change. I don't believe in your new world crap and you won't have my help.

-I thought you'd say that.

Kaname was indignant. She finally realized that all the whispers- the ones that reached from north korea, even into her dreams, they all came from her- Sofia.

Physically, Sofia was long dead. Eighteen years ago, she was the test subject for the TAROS at Yamsk-11, and when that experiment went wrong, she died. However, just before death, her psychic waves were amplified many times, and not only killed the people in the immediate vicinity, but also reached newborns across the world. These waves also reached into the future, where there was another Sofia (or Kaname) - she told her of the newborn "Whispered", and the future one then transmitted them the information, which became known as "Black Technology".

-You can't stop it now or this world will come to nothing.

-What?

-Just look around you and you'll see that they will fall, one by one.

It was as if she could see everything happening to them at once. Tessa shooting a submachine gun trying desperately to reach Kaname, Sousuke was about to be killed by the Belial, and Mao and the others were fighting at the missle base against a horribly fierce enemy. She could see how everything was going to turn out and it wasn't in their favor.

-Do you think this is an illusion? No... it's fact. You can't change their futures unless you change the here and now, do you understand? Leonard's opponent is doing great, all things considered. But-...

- Stop it...

- ...he can't be saved.

The white AS appeared from the fog, and the Belial immediately attacked.

- STOP!

Leonard didn't. The Belial's hand went for the opponent's chest, pierced it and reappeared from the back. The cockpit capsule inside was crushed - she didn't want to see what happened inside, not even guess. Impossible despair gripped Kaname's heart. It had just happened. The Belial had destroyed the

Laevatein's cockpit. Blood or oil, or maybe a mix of both, was flowing from the pierced chest. This was

not an illusion.

Sousuke was dead. He died a moment ago.

-If you understand then don't get in my way. You can't accept this as the world you live in right? You have the power to change it! If you would let your selfish pride get in your way and watch the man you love die, go ahead. But you'll never be safe in this world without him.

Kaname fell on her knees and tried to cover her ears, but Sofia grabbed her by the shoulder and continued to yell.

- Right, you remember this feeling, don't you? Oh, yes you do. Four years ago, that hospital in Tokyo...

Kaname froze.

Images of her mothers emmanent death the swirl of emotions that consumed her, Sousuke dead now too, it was too much to bear. A primordial scream left her lips one of anger, sadness, dispare, all caused her to cry out to the heavens. She crumpled to the floor wanting to return to that nothingness.

-Can you accept this?

-No.

-Can you forgive this?

-No.

-You have the power to change it. Let's finish it together, don't worry I'll make all of your wishes come true.

Before she noticed the change, she was sitting at the dining table. It was breakfast time, and she saw the vapour rising from the bowls of miso and white rice. She smelled fish, and grated daikon, raw egg and mozuku vinegar, nori and egg furikake, and the leftover pork stew from yesterday... a very nostalgic smell.

-Kaname how's your blood pressure this morning? Are you feeling alright there sweetheart?

Her mother spoke. It was the most beautiful sound she had ever heard. She closed her eyes momentarily to savour the sweet feeling. Her mother made a face seeing Kaname's reaction and promptly puts a hand to her forehead. Shocked out of her rever by her mothers cool fingertips, Kaname says exasperated:

-I'm fine! Will you lay off the blood pressure mom? Every morning! Geez!

-Hey it's not very nice to talk to Mom that way Kaname! Chided her sister Ayame.

She looked over to her father who was reading the news in his morning paper.

-You got something to say too dad?

-Mmm? Sorry girls there's just an interesting article on robotics and artificial intelligence in the paper.

-Robots? Who ever thought those things would even exsist... Her mother pondered.

- What about you Kaname? What's your take?

- I mean I guess it's interesting but the only thing it's really capable of is walking around and doing little chores? I always thought of robots as... She trailed off as she looked at the clock.

-Oh no! I'm gonna be late for school!

-Kananme remember to tell me about that date you went on yesterday when you get home. Her mother teased.

Kaname's face turns red at the thought.

-It was NOT a date Mom!

She sounded surprised, but immediately remembered everything. Yesterday was Sunday, and she went to see a movie with a boy from her school. Well, it wasn't really a date... they went to Shinjuku to see a movie, then drank tea, went shopping a little, and parted ways at Choufu station - and that was all... but, wait, wasn't this a date after all? At that thought her face only deepend in its crimson glaze. She hopped up out of the chair with a piece of toast hanging out of her mouth.

-Bye everyone! I'll be back later!

She sprints out of the house to the promised meeting place.

_-Sagara-kun._

_There, on the other side of the ticket barrier, she met him. _

- Ah... Sagara-kun...

- Oh... good morning, Chidori-san, - Sagara Sousuke nodded in greeting.

- Thanks for yesterday, I had fun! - she smiled.

Sousuke's cheeks flshed a little, and he said after a little pause:

- Ah... y-yes, I... had fun, too.

- Good! Thanks for fixing the laptop again!

- Mm... if you ever have any trouble with it... I, I'll help.

- Thanks! You really saved me there!

- No, it was simple, really... s-so, don't worry, - said Sousuke, scratching the back of his head, obviously

flustered.

It was the same yesterday. Unlike other boys, he was quite shy, and seemed somewhat tense. He was

quite handsome, good at sports, and had a lot of secret admirers among the girls, but didn't realise it

himself. He had a thing for computers and all kinds of machines, and his friends were mostly the same.

Thus, without any particular reason, they were walking together to school.

- Er, Chidori-san...

- Mm, yes?

- I don't really know how to say it... well, yesterday, watching that movie together was really fun.

- Mm?

- Er, no, well, I don't mean anything weird. It's just that I... didn't really go out with a girl before. I was really... worried.

- Mm, I understood that. It looked like he was going vent some of that tension.

- Ah, well... I thought about it later, and I must've been really... unsociable. Was it all right?..

- Yep, it was fine. You were your usual self, Sagara-kun.

- Right, good, - he muttered, and smiled broadly.

- You know, I usually go out to see movies and stuff with Kyouko or Shiori, and that's it. I too was a bit

nervous. So...

-Listen!

Sousuke clenched his fists, mobilising every ounce of his courage, and looked her straight in the eyes.

- Would you... go out with me? - he almost shouted these words of confession. - I liked you for a long

time already, but you're a popular person, and I thought I wouldn't bother you and kept my distance... But

after I fixed your PC, and we talked, and walked around together yesterday, I kind of got the feeling that

you're a really good person, not showy or anything... and I liked that, too...

Kaname was silent.

- Was I wrong?..

- You kind of understood it? That I don't like people who show off, and all...

- I'm not like that...

- I know. He suddenly became much more serious.

- I won't ever make you sad, Chidori-san.

- Mm.

She thought that was questionable, but believed him for now.

- So, well... I'd like to hear your answer.

She had to say yes or no clearly, right now.

_After all, I've been waiting for you for eighteen years... Waiting to be held, to be embraced by you. I'm _

_happy... This was my wish. _

- Of course, yes, because I love you... Sousuke.

She reached up to his face to caress the cross shaped scar on his jawline, but it wasn't there. This person, wasn't _her_ Sousuke. The world that had created that man was one of war and struggle and survival. No matter how much she wanted him to be that man, he was not. He couldn't be replicated, and the person standing in front of her was not him. She had lost him forever, - she knew it, no matter how much she tried to deceive herself, no matter how many sweet days she would spend with this boy who had no scars. The time she had spent with Sousuke - yes, those days were noisy, messy, full of nonsense, but her heart longed for them. Now, however, they would not return. She could do nothing.

She could not imagine being part of that world. Everything around her began to disappear she was in the empty space again, only several thousandths of a second had passed and Sofia stood there amazed.

-Isn't that what you wanted you foolish girl! Do you understand that he along with everyone else will die? That you won't get to meet him ever again? You're leaving your mother too- dead.. You're abandoning the world for your own selfish reasons! This is a SIN.

- So what... there's nothing I can do...

- Yes there is! Continue the process of rebirth! You cannot give up, not now! You would be running away, abandoning everything!

- There is nothing to abandon, and nothing to give up on...

-You're decieving yourself! You have the power to ressurect the dead and change the world and you won't use it?

-There is no one to ressurect, they are all alive right now... in this moment.

-They are dead! She conjured the image of the Laevatein's cockpit pierced through.

-There's nothing to be done about that! Kaname screeched. Tears cascading down her cheeks uncontrolably.

-This decision will be the biggest regret of you life! Sofia exclaimed.

-NO! Because he would agree with me, I know it! He's lost a lot of important people in his life and somehow he bears it, so will I! He wouldn't come to love me if I was a weak person. He and many others have risked their lives for me, it's time to return that debt. I will live on and show him who's got guts!

At that the space began to warp and twist slowly disolving around her like waking up from a dream. The machine practically breaking down upon the girls awakening.

_-Sousuke... I live, while you are dead. I don't even mind it that much. I'll find myself an even better man, and will become happy! _She promised herself.

The transformation of the world had stopped. Time had resumed its normal flow, and the sounds of the fierce battle outside reached her inside the dome.


	8. Chapter 8

As the monomolecular cutter pierced the armor of Leviathan Leonard could feel the bursting of something in the cockpit.

-You always were a nusicence Saraga Sousuke-kun.

He could not feel anything upon his death. No feelings of sorrow or regret, just emptiness. The only thing left was to let Sofia change the world. But what was this? The feeling of change before was omnipitent but now there was nothingness. The psychic wave that seemed to resound upon the earth was now silent. Something had gone terribly wrong.

At the shock of this he pulls the monomolecular cutter from the cockpit and instead of seeing blood, flesh, and oils on his knife he only saw oil. There had been no one in the cockpit from the start.

-DAMN HIM!

He had one shot left.

-I have to make it! I have to...

The rocket launcher was aimed for the deteriorated area on the Belial's waist, where the demolition cannon had blown away a good portion. The cover he created was better than expected, hiding by the feet of the Belial wanting to get the closest shot possible. He fired point blank. The armour, weakened by Sousuke's previous shot, broke into a thousand pieces that pierced the outer core and the fuel systems of the palladium reactor. It was not a fission reactor, so it would not cause an uncontrolled chain reaction - as the nuclear core was detroyed, the plasma inside overflowed and melted everything like butter. For a moment, a great, uncontrolled surge of current overloaded all of Belial's systems, burning out most of the muscle package. The devil was devoured by its own flames, and fell. The world's most powerful machine was destroyed by an old infantry rocket launcher.

The fight wasn't over yet.

Cocking his Glock 17 he pointed it at the burning wreckage of the Belial. He began to cautiously move forward, eyes trained on the spot he figured Leonard would come from. Then he saw him, pistol pointed at Sousuke with a large wound in his abdomen. Sousuke shoots first. He strikes Leonard's shoulder causing the gun to fall to the floor with a liquid metal sound.

-I saw it happen, I kill you, you should be dead and the world should be changing. Leonard mutters.

-That was my plan from the start, to make you think that way. Sousuke cooly replies.

An emotional floodgate opens in Leonard and he is laughing, crying, happy and sad all in the same instant.

-If she knew what mother did...How could she? I always thought she was a stupid little sister, but now it appears that she is tougher than me. All I wanted was to be normal... live a peaceful life...

-I've wanted the same thing for a while now, though when it started I can't really say. Sousuke states as he lowers the gun.

-YOU THINIK THIS IS OVER?

-No.

Sousuke had already noticed the small remote that Leonard held in his hand. A detonator of some sort, maybe the self-destruct button for the facility. There was no choice but to kill him, even if he was Tessa's brother. Suddenly a shot from behind and the blood is shooting out of Leonard's chest. Sousuke rolls into cover and notices that man- Andri Kalinin – shotgun in hand and a limp form of a girl over his shoulder.

-YOU FAILED KALININ LET THE GIRL GO!

He had no intention of giving up and Sousuke knew it. He was not the type of man to stop fighting because the leader had been killed. In fact he was the one who killed him. Kalinin for all of his years on the battlefields he had never looked more terrifying then he did at that moment.

-I'm taking the girl. She is to fulfill the mission at all costs.

-Traitor!

He had never felt more hatred towards a human being in his entire life. He _wanted_ to kill this man, for his own reasons. He knew him from way back- Afghanistan, he was like a father to Sousuke why was he doing this? Yet now it seemed like a lifetime ago since they became enemies. Any affection towards the man he once considered like a father was gone in a flash. After exchaning several rounds of fire at eachother the Russian man took the girl down the corridor and to the runway. Sousuke followed, only giving a brief look back at Leonard, feeling a sense of pity wash over him.

He counted his bullets, and strode forward.

-_The power of Sousuke Sagara and Teletha Testarossa is terrifying._

The old Russian soldier thought even though he had faced many a daunting foe. They have broken through our defences and now it's come to this. They had utterly defeated him in this sourie. At least if he had the girl he could start off again, to change this world he had come to despise so much. If his protogee was going to try to stop him, he would show no mercy.

-Chidori!

Sousuke was on his heels and the helicopter was on stand-by. He _would_ escape and start the process all over again.

-Chidori!

He kept screaming her name trying to rouse her from her stupor.

-_Have to make it there. Have to get on that helicopter, or stop it._

A burst of inspriation! A bundle of cording used to fix things is affixed to the floor with 3 meters of reinforced steel cord. Then the sound of a horrible wreck, metal against metal as the helicopter swayed, but refused to fall. At that Souske jumps into the hovering heli and rushes straight for Kaname. She seems to be waking from her stupor.

-Chidori! Get a grip on yourself we have to go now!

He rushed to her side and helped her to stand. This was the closest he had been to her in a year and the flood of emotions just had to stay their banks, now was not the time.

-Wha? Is this a dream?

-NO! It's real and we're going back together!

At that Kalinin bursts into the cargo hold with a rifle in his hands. He shoves Kaname out of the open door as a piercing pain punctures his back. Since the AS pilot suit was bulletproof he wasn't hurt but there was a deep pain. The helicopter was swaying dangerously and the cargo freights that filled the hold were beginning to fall. The helicopter lurched and then began to move up and away, leaving Sousuke to deal with Kalinin alone. Thats when it happened. The helicopter starts to loose control and beings to fall from the sky. The trees were the first thing it hit followed by the rocky ground below.


	9. Chapter 9

She hit the pavement hard instantly knocking her out. Then out of nothingness she begins to hear a little noise...

-Ka...n...e

What was this? She recognized the voice but couldn't quite place a face.

-Ch...i...d

Ah that voice! She knew it well. But it wasn't from who she expected. Tessa. She slowly opens her eyes blinking up at the girl, she couldn't believe she was alive.

-Kaname Chidori-san! Tessa barked at her over and over.

-Tessa?

-Report the situation!

-Sousuke saved me... helicopter...

She points to where there is now a huge plume of black smoke. Tessa then begins to check her state of health and mental stability.

-_This girl has a terrible fever, her body weight is much too low, she seems dehydrated too..but other than that she is in satisfactory condition._

-You have to listen to me Kaname-san. There is a nuclear warhead coming to this island. Impact is imminent and we are barely going to escape this explosion. We have no time to look for Sagara-san. I'm sorry Kaname-chan, we have to leave him here.

-Wha...?

She pushes the plunger on the sedatives she had prepared in her uniform. Kaname's body instantly goes limp.

-_I'm sorry Kaname-san, but this is for your own good._

Mardukas takes the girl in his arms and takes her to where the turboprop "King Air" lies in wait. Tessa begins to feverishly contact Sousuke on the communications system.

-Ansuz to Urzu 7! Ansuz to Urzu 7, repeat! This island will be subject to a nuclear strike in 17 minutes! Come in!

No response.


	10. Chapter 10

-This is Urzu 7

His voice was taught choking on the smoke and the smell of the wreckage.

-My preset location is near radar number 3. Yours?

-SAGARA-SAN!

He could hear the emotion in her voice.

-Tessa, I'm glad you're ok. He managed.

-We're on the runway, Kaname-san is fine we are getting out of here! Nuclear strike in 16 minutes! Get here as quickly as you can!

-Negative, Ansuz. Engaged in combat with the enemy. Linking up is impossible if you want to get out alive. Go...now!

His battle was not over.

There was Kalinin. Standing amongst the wreckage of the fuselage, rotor blade and fragments of the metal exterior.

- Are you finished with the transmission?

- Of course.

Somewhere behind them, one of the heli's engines exploded, and the area was showered with fragments of turbine blades, screws and torn pieces of aluminum alloy casing.

The explosion was like a sign. A cloud of smoke covered the area temporarily, and Kalinin used that to

rush towards him. His movements had been almost sluggish until then, but at that moment his speed was incredible. There were no feints, no clever techniques, no flexible use of wrists and shoulders - just the point of his knife, coming straight at him.

He barely had time to move his head, and he felt the blade swish past his throat. This stab turned into a slashing attack faster than he could imagine. He thought that his opponent would try to grapple him, but instead he was aiming at his back. Sousuke dodged and jumped away, to get a little distance, and the enemy looked like he was going to kick up the dust at him. Sousuke closed one eye and tried to aim for his opponent's leg, but instead of kicking up dust Kalinin's leg came at his temple. He blocked it with difficulty - but not completely. The impact on his left hand, that was blocking the kick, was probably the most powerful he had ever received in hand to hand combat. He staggered, barely managed to right himself, and tried to slash his opponent. Kalinin dodged the attack without difficulty, and with the same movement the heel of his jungle boot struck Sousuke's side.

- You really have no talent for this Sagara.

- What is that supposed to mean old man?

-_I know I'm weak and have no talent for this already. You're not telling me something I don't already know. Mao, Clouseau, Kurz they all have superior abilities. The only thing I have is my will to survive._

He charged at Kalinin barely avoiding a well placed slash, the sun was in the old Russian's eyes and this may be the only chance he has left. He grapples him almost preforming a sode-tsuri-kom-goshi (a judo maneuver) The enemy dropped his weapon. This was it victory was close. He began headbutting him several times to create an opening for himself. CRACK- his nose is broken. Still on his enemy's back, locking his hands, Sousuke reached for the knife that he still had, and stabbed at the man's defenseless chest. He struck a rib, and remembered that he had to hold the blade horizontally.

Sousuke remembered where the heart was - he only had to push the blade in, and almost felt the sensation of serrated steel piercing flesh and ripping apart arteries...

But he just couldn't do it. He couldn't kill the only man he had ever viewed as a father.

-That's why I said you have no talent for this.

He takes the blade from his chest and slowly begins to get up. Sousuke retreats a few paces.

- You're a lamb, brought up by a pack of wolves. You don't need blood, you've no taste for flesh, but you still pretend to be a wolf, because if you didn't, you would die. Is there a more twisted and sorrowful existence?..

- Like I know...

- You shouldn't have to do this. You shouldn't have become the man that could drive me into a corner.

Not Kassim, or even Uruz seven, no... You should have been a normal boy with a normal family- but no you destroyed that for yourself.

Kalinin takes the blade from his chest and brandishes it in front of Sousuke.

-I'm going to do what you couldn't.

-It doesn't matter we're both going to die here anyways.

He painfully walks towards Sousuke, but the stab he was awaiting never came. Instead, Kalinin coughs up huge amounts of blood and drops the blade before falling to his knees. Shrapnel was piercing through his broad back and into his internal organs. Yet he continued to fight.

-Why?

-It was my last chance to...train... I wanted... think... about what you are...

Sousuke bent down to hear his words, blood soaked through and through, Kalinin had one last reprieve in him.

-I knew you wouldn't stab... you were always a gentle child, I just wanted to...go back... to get you and Irina and the child...

-That's why? That's why you destroyed Kaname's life? MY LIFE?

-You thought I didn't have flaws?

-THAT'S WHAT A FATHER IS!

-A father is it? Kalinin smiles briefly and reaches up to take hold of Sousuke's shoulder.

-_Ikinasai _

At this the hand that was gripping Sousuke's shoulder looses that spark of strengthen and falls limply to the ground. The sound of the turboprop engine taking off struck out of his ruminating, he doesn't know how long he's been sitting there. Weakly he peers at his watch. 10 minutes left until the nuclear strike and his eminent death. If the plane flew quickly enough it should make it to the outer rim of the safe zone just in time.

-_Chidori_

There were so many things he wanted to tell her, to see if she was okay, to hold her and take her back to Jindai High just like he had promised. But in the end he had said horrible things to her and thrown her from a helicopter. Typical. 15 seconds inside of a helicopter after chasing her for more than a year.

-_I hope she can be happy after this, from now on._

It was his hearts deepest wish at that moment, but he had no way of knowing, not now or ever. He sighed and picked himself up off the ground and took off twords the base knowing deep in his heart there was no hope.

-_Ikinasai_

The words became an order, the last words from his "father's" true heart.

He found one of the entrances to the base in a corner of the manoeuvring grounds. Kicking down the wire mesh gate, he jumped down the staircase - it didn't even take him thirty seconds. Turning several corners and passing several doors, he suddenly found himself standing in corridor the warhead on that ICBM, the underground structures of Merida would not withstand the heat, or

the shockwave of the detonation, even if he ran to the drainage facilities at the very bottom of the

underground base. Even if he somehow managed to survive the initial impact, the structures would

collapse, and ocean water would flow in, drowning him. Either way led to the same result. It was futile

trying to hide underground, and there didn't seem to be any methods of escape.

He looked at the watch. Seven minutes.

- Nothing I can do, eh...

It seemed to be futile. He sat on the floor of corridor zero, thinking, and then noticed a large hole in the wall. On the other side was the dry dock, where he settled his score with the Belial. Then a thought struck him like a bolt of lightning.

-_I forgot about AL!_

He trecks through the rubble to find where he had left the Laevatein, acessing the damage he sees that the head unit is practically intact and undamaged.

_-His hearing functioning should be sound._

-Al?

-I thought you were going to leave me this way.

The cockpit had been destroyed, but Al's core unit was in the abdomen. The manoeuvre had been

dangerous for him, but he had survived.

- You know about the nuke?

_- Yes, I do. I had been monitoring the transmission from Afghanistan. _

- Right...

_- It is a MIRV design, with each warhead carrying a nominal charge of 550 kilotons in TNT equivalent, _

_all of them targeting Merida. It is impossible to take refuge on the island. _

- Yeah, isn't it...

-How much time left?

- Approximately 5 minutes and counting.

-Shit, it seems so long.

-Indeed Sergeant.

It was then he remembered the letter he had written to Kaname expressing everything he didn't have the courage to tell her face to face.

-At least she'll be able to read that now.

-Define "that."

-A letter of goodbye to Angel.

-By Angel do you mean Miss Chidori-san?

-Yes Al.

-Do you love her Sergeant Sagara?

-I suppose I do Al.

-Do you want to meet her no matter what?

-I would if I could. How much time left?

-One minute.

-_I don't want to die without meeting her._

This overwhelming thought flooded every parameter of his being.

-I... don't... want.. to die.

His voice sounded different, somehow not his own, and his throat felt funny and tight. His face grew hot and he felt something- not blood- running down his face. He finally realised what was happening. For the first time in his life that he can remember, he is crying, genuinely sobbing.

_- ...sergeant. Thirty seconds left,_ - said Al.

- No... don't want to...

_- The TAROS is destroyed. It is also impossible to use the Lambda Driver. _

- ...I... know...

Twenty seconds.

_- I want to try something, but first I want to ask. Am I human, or machine? _

- You... It would be simple to say that he was... but that was simply no longer the case. He was a much more advanced being than that. Decide it for yourself. People... do that.

_- I am grateful. _

Five seconds.

- What are?

_- I'll try it by myself. _

The air around the Laevatein, lying in the middle of the room, started vibrating.

_Zero. _

The equivalent of fifty-five megatons of TNT detonated in the sky above Merida island.


	11. Chapter 11

She was surrounded in blackness. The turbulence of the turboprop eventually roused her. The first thing she sees is a face, blurry but with ash blonde hair.

-_Tessa, thank god she's alright. But I knew that? Or -_

She had the overwhelming feeling that she was in a nightmare or another of Sofia's traps.

-Oh god- Where is he? Where's Sousuke?

Tessa's face became more melancholy looking sadder, thinner, and more exhausted than Kaname ever thought her face could look. She looked decades beyond her years.

-Kaname-san I need you to remain calm. -She peeks at her watch- Sousuke is still alive right now, but very soon he will not b-

-But why?

-Please let me finish. We had to get off of the Island, a nuclear warhead is headed straight for there, Sousuke was engaged in combat with Kalinin and had no means of escape. He instructed us to escape without him and that is exactly what we have done.

-You didn't help him? You didn't even look for him?

-We had no time Kaname-san. As it is we're barely going to make it to the outer rim of the Safety Zone. I couldn't risk the lives of everyone else to save his. This was the decision I made as a Commanding Officer. Please Kaname-san try to understand.

Tears began pouring uncontrollably from her eyes. She sunk down to her knees, head down, hair covering her face.

-I understand Tessa, but it also wasn't your decision.

-Kana-

- It was his.

She clamped a hand to her mouth, muffling the wail. This was the world she had chosen, like it or not, she had to accept the world for what it was- good, bad, or otherwise. She looks over to Tessa who is trying her best to control her emotions with machine like precision. She can't take that look on Tessa's face anymore turned and hugged the girl.

-Tessa... I'm so glad you're safe...

At that gesture Teletha Testarossa, the levee of emotions she had been carrying, burst open and she cried like a girl of her age should. Out of the 25 select individuals she had taken with her on this mission less than 15 had survived. And there was Sousuke. Kaname knew how Tessa felt about him and knew that his death must be as hard on her as it is on herself. Her ash-blonde hair was tinted pink in places from all of the blood. She looked wizened, exhausted, and paltry. Kaname then stopped for a period to think about what all she had been through compared to these people.

-_This crew. All of them...even ones that have passed like Gail Mcallen...They all risked everything to save me and stop Leonard. How many have died for me? More than just Sousuke..._

She still had Tessa wrapped in a hug, letting her cry out all of her frustrations. Her jaw clenched tight, the tears started to subside somewhat she heard it.

BOOM!

The sound of a nuclear warhead decimating a little island. It couldn't be described in words. It was a sound of necrosis. Her eyes began pouring tears anew for the now confirmed obliteration of Sousuke Sagara.

The two girls held onto each other for dear life after that sound. The thoughts of having nothing left of him, not even enough to bury or put in an urn is what hurt Kaname the most at that point.

-_There will be nothing left of him...not even ash..._

It was then Kaname noticed something was staring at her, something out of place for a turboprop plane.

-Shiro!

She sees Sousuke's pet tiger in a cage at the back of the plane. She leaps up from where Tessa is clinging to her and runs to open the cage. Everyone freezes as Kaname easily pops off the locks and lets the animal out, because no one knew where the tiger even came from. The tiger, after pushing it way out of the cage, immediately rears back on two legs with its paws up in the air- everyone stops breathing. The tiger then happily places its big paws on Kaname's shoulders and begins to lick her head.

-This guy here, was Sousuke's idea of a suitable house pet! In Tokyo of all places!

Kaname almost snorts at the memory and a smile plays across her face. But the smile lasts only for an instant. The rest of the crew let out a sigh of relief and a good humored chuckle because it seemed so befitting for Sousuke to think like that. Kaname wrapped her arms around the big cat and nuzzled the soft fur to her face.

-At least we have something left to remember Sousuke by. Mused Tessa.

-But what are we going to do with him?

-There's the Ueno Zoo. Kaname suggests. I would like to be able to visit him whenever I can.

-That sounds like a good plan Kaname-san.

-What's gonna happen to me now Tessa?

-You will go back to Japan and continue on with you life. I do not believe you are in any immediate danger and will not be so for a long time. This blow to Amalgam was a decisive victory in our favor, but after this I'm afraid there will be nothing left of Mithril. I don't really know what I'll do myself. I've never been just a normal girl so I wonder if I should like to try that.

Kaname didn't believe what she was hearing.

-_Go back home and live a normal life? How can I do that now? After these last two years, how can I pretend like they didn't happen?_

After that, Kaname didn't say much for the rest of the flight. She and Tessa basically held onto each other for the support they needed and nothing was said. Every one was exhausted from the more than a year of constant fighting and fleeing, this would be their last time together like this.

Subsequently they met with the rest of the team who had been deployed to the missile base in Afghanistan. The first person Kaname sees after she exits the plane is the form of someone she did not expect. Kurz Weber, blonde hair, blue eyes, and really not looking too bad considering everyone thought he was dead. He comes bounding over to her like a puppy.

-Kaname-chan!

Instead of punching him in the face like she normally would have, she embraces the slightly older man in a warm hug.

-I'm glad to see you didn't wimp out and die on us Kurz, I knew you had more guts then that.

She said with a dubious smile. The next people to greet her were Melissa Mao and Belfangan Clouseau, though he was wrapped in bandages head to toe and in a wheelchair.

-Madam Captain, Angel, glad to see you both safe.

-What are you doing out here Lutenist? You should be resting in the hospital!

-I wanted to see with my own eyes that you made it back safely Captain.

Tessa looks around to all of the rag-tag members of her crew that are left. They are all hanging around the ship saluting her as she passes. She returns the salute with an emotional few words for each member. The only thing left to do was to tie up the loose ends.

They were treated very well aboard captain Sailor's vessel, but after docking in Hawaii, they had been

taken into custody by the Navy intelligence. She had thought that severe questioning was about to begin, but admiral Borda came to pick her up just in time. She didn't know what connections he had used, but the entire crew and Kaname was freed. To her surprise, she heard that Seals and Courtney, previously charged with appropriation of military vehicles and AS, were also acquitted. There was one matter in particular that she had wanted to take care of herself before Kaname was sent back to Japan, and that was of reading Sousuke's Will and Testament. She was joined by Mardukas and Broda a short time before the reading of the will.

- A report just came in. The military decided to lower their level to DEFCON four. For the time being at

least, I'm pretty sure the crisis is averted.

- Really...

- But I'll remember those three hours after the explosion forever. It was a ballistic missile launch after all... and those five minutes after we realised it was heading towards some unpopulated island were a goddamn nightmare.

-It wasn't entirely unpopulated. Corrected Tessa.

The West was about to retaliate, and both Hunter and Lemon outdid themselves - they tried to spread the information that the nuclear base was under control as fast as possible between the intelligence agencies across the world. In the end, they had averted World War III. This world couldn't be called peaceful, but it returned to its normal functioning. Both good and bad things would happen in any living society, after all.


	12. Chapter 12

Since she had returned Kaname had been running a terrible fever and was in the hospital wing for over a month. Tessa had tried to wake her up by using "resonance" once, but nothing happened. She thought that the girl was rejecting her attempts, but that didn't seem right. In fact, she didn't feel that "whispering" voice even once from the time of that battle on Merida. Sometimes, she thought she had echoes or deja vu sensations, and would be quite cautious about it for a long time; but it seemed that they all would never hear that voice again. She hadn't yet decided whether it was a good or bad thing. She slept for the first two weeks. Besides the fever there wasn't anything particularly wrong, it just seemed like she didn't want to wake up. This day she was feeling better and her fever had subsided somewhat.

-_I guess I'll return to Japan soon. To Jindai High School. To my life before Sousuke._

She stretched her arms over her head knowing that her life would never go back to the way it was before she met him. She wouldn't let it. There was a light knock on her room door and she called out

-Come in!

It was Tessa in uniform followed closely by two subordinates whom she didn't recognize also in uniform carrying a folded Mithril flag. She knew what this was. She immediately drew herself up and smiled at them all.

-Chidori Kaname-san. As you know, Sergeant Sousuke Sagara has gone on patrol. I'm am here to read you his Will and Testament as well and impart a few of his belongings to you along with this flag.

-Wait isn't that stuff supposed to be going to like his family?

-Since Sergeant Sagara has no known family, and as it states in his will, all of his property will convert over to you. This includes all of his personal property as well as all of his finances. As it so happens Mr. Sagara was very frugal with his money and made good investments as well as a very successful hedge fund. According to the financial team here including his liquid assets and his contract making weapons for different armed forces, Sousuke Sagara was worth roughly $6.2 million American dollars.

-Wha-? I don't understand? How could he have that much money? Kaname gaped at the exorbitant amount of money.

- It seems that was very smart with his investments...

-Knowing that idiot he probably just didn't know what to spend his money on.

They all laughed knowing that Kaname's assessment was probably more right then they could ever guess.

-There is one item that he specifically asks to be built, a School in a town near Namasak.

-Why would Sousuke want to build a school?

-That I have no guess on Kaname-san, but it seems after he left Japan when all of this started that was one of the places he went to. There's one more thing. Tessa pulls out an envelope from the documents. Scrawled across the front of the white paper was a single word in Sousuke's unique handwriting:

Angel

Kaname reaches out an unsteady hand to receive the snow white envelope. Her finger gets cut on the edge of the paper causing her to withdraw her hand and put the finger in her mouth.

-_Careful it bites_. Kaname mutters to herself, not really sure why.

She then puts her other hand out and has Tessa place it flat on her palm. She slowly begins to break the seal when Tessa stops her.

-I think that this would best be done in private, don't you agree Kaname-san?

-Yeah I guess you're right.

She stops what she is doing and decides that she will read the letter once she is truly alone, back in Tokyo in her spacious apartment. She places the letter with the few items they had brought her. Dog tags, a few of his clothes, rucksack, and his Glock 19. Kaname wasn't big on guns, but after everything she had been through she supposed it would be good for her to keep one in the house, with rubber bullets of course. She packs all of his things up in his rucksack along with the few meager belongings she had been given. It had already been a month but the pain in her chest was as heavy as ever. What would she do when she got back? The graduation ceremony must be coming up but Kaname would have to repeat the 2nd year. She was not looking forward to that. In fact she wasn't looking forward to going back to school at all not even reuniting with Kyoko seemed to lessen the pain. As she was folding his things a small memory card fell out of the pocket of one of his desert print cammo pants.

-_I wonder what's on this?_

She pockets the memory card and goes off to find someone with the capabilities to read it. The first person she finds is Melissa Mao, still recovering from her injuries but lively all the same.

-Hey Melissa I was wondering if you knew of anywhere I could read this memory card, I've been looking around for a while but I can't seem to find anything useful.

-Sure, I know the perfect place!

She then pushes Kaname down the hall at a great pace eager to find out what was on that card herself. She slams open the door to Kurz Webers room and promptly pushes him off his seat in front of his laptop computer.

-I'll be confiscating this computer for a while Kurz, Kaname really needs to use it.

She gave him a grin while for some reason he was sweating bullets. She knew that look, and obviously he had been doing something pervy when they walked in. Kaname is sitting with a hand to her mouth in front of the computer screen as a pornographic video site is displayed across the wide screen. Melissa, her fist clenched in rage, wallops Weber right in the face. She immediately closes the window only to find more pornographic sites behind it.

-Aha ha. Ah... I can explain Mao! My computer has a virus see...

At that she reaches out a hand as if to help him up.

-Oh I understand Kurz, you don't have to explain it to me...

As he reaches up to take her hand she grabs his wrist and flings him over her shoulder and out into the hallway. She dusts her hands off as if she has just taken out a huge sack of garbage.

-Now that that's settled... Melissa then pops the memory card into the deck and the computer begins to read it.

-So it's a video?

The resolution was pretty low, lots of grain, mono sound. First, a classroom came into view - a little

different from what she remembered. The scene outside the window was also slightly different. Sounds of the brass band club practicing. Shouts from the baseball team, training outside. Girls' laughter from the corridor. This was, unmistakeably, Jindai classroom was probably not the familiar 2-4, but the one above it, 3-4. The picture wobbled, and suddenly the floor and ceiling changed places.

_- Hey, is this thing on already? _

_- It's upside down. Look. _

The camera was finally fixed on a tripod, and the picture became steady. The first thing that came into

view, was the face of Shinji Kazama. No mistake, it was really him.

_- Err, ahem. We don't really know where you guys are, and what you're doing, so we thought we would give you some news this way. If you see this, please contact us, somehow. _

_- Hey, hey, you're not really making any sense this way! - came a voice from outside the picture, and _

_some people laughed. _

_- B-but, we don't really remember if it's ok to say names and all... we'll be laying this out for the world to see, you know. _

_- Who cares. Come on, one-two- _

The picture moved again, and now showed the students gathered in front of the blackboard, three dozen of them. She knew them all well - she wouldn't forget any of their faces. They all shouted at once:

_- Chidori! Sagara! Come back quickly! _

They were definitely far from being in perfect unison, and then broke out into laughter, with some saying "let's remake this", and others telling them to leave it this way.

Kazama turned the camera back towards him. A somewhat strained file was on his face.

_- ...so-o, that's sort of what we wanted to do. Thought that you two might see it somewhere. So, whom shall we start with? _

_- Sensei! Sensei will go first!_ - shouted many voiced behind the camera, some people whistled and

clapped. Kazama left the picture, and was replaced by a woman - their female teacher, Eri Kagurazaka.

She had always worn a suit before, but now she was in a loose shirt and casual pants.

_- Eeh... Sagara-kun, Chidori-san. I'm your homeroom teacher, Kagurazaka. How are you? A lot of things happened, but everyone is doing their best. I'm keeping your personal effects, so don't worry about them. _

_- Sensei, is there really nothing else you could say? _

_- Ah... well, as a matter of fact, last year I've married Mizuhoshi-sensei. Thanks to you, I finally did it. _

_Thank you, really! _

Cheers from the class.

_- Sensei, there's something else, isn't there? _

_- Oh... right, well. After you all graduate, in April, I will go on maternity leave. We are expecting a baby _

_in June. If you can, please come back to meet us. _

Overwhelming sound of applause. Eri awkwardly left the picture.

_- Next! Who's next? _

_- Kyouko! Let Kyouko do it! _

_- ... eh, me? I... err... _

_- Kyouko! Kyouko! _

Kyouko Tokiwa entered the picture. It looked like she had done away with her usual childish pigtails. She looked a bit grown up, but looked in good health.

_- Um... Kana-chan, Sagara-kun. I'm fine, as you see. You must've been really worried, but please, don't. _

_Oh and by the way, Hammy's now staying with me, so don't worry. The graduation's on the third of _

_March. I'd be very happy if you could let us know how you're doing until then... _

_- Right, thank you! _

_- Next? Come on people! _

_- Ono-D, go on! _

The camera shook again.

_- Eh? I, well, don't-... _

_- Oh, right! Ono-D! Your turn, Ono-D! _

_- But ehh... _

_- No, you have to. You want to say a lot of things, don't you? Well go ahead. _

Koutarou Onodera slowly, reluctantly walked into the picture.

_- Come on, dude, say at least something! _

_- ..ehh... what, sheesh,_ - Onodera was scratching his head, glancing at the camera hesitantly, but finally

turned towards it.

_- Well... Sagara... I'm sorry,_ - he said awkwardly, not looking at the camera, - _I kinda lost it that time, and after that... well, I've been hearing things, and thinking... if it was all your fault or not. _

His voice became cooler, and the class was completely silent, waiting for his next words.

_- Well, eh... were you keeping too many things from us, or not... but I realised that you guys also had your reasons. So, as I said, I kinda lost it then, in the heat of the moment... gah, sorry, man, it's just an excuse. Anyway, when you get back, let us know. We're waiting. _

Koutarou then quickly escaped behind the camera. After that, his classmates one by one transmitted their messages to Kaname and Sousuke. The tears wouldn't stop coming, she couldn't believe after everything she had put them through that they still wanted her back. It was unbelieveable.

-So those guys are your friends right?

-Yeah.

-They'll be happy to see you when you return.

-I'm not really looking forward to it.

-Why is that?

-I'll have to tell them that he's dead...because of... of... me...

She begins to weep bitter tears and Mao just hugs her in a sisterly embrace.

-It wasn't your fault.

-Yes it was. He was coming after me, even after I told him not to, he still came for me.

- You have to understand one thing about Sousuke, Kaname, and that is he always completes a mission no matter what the cost. It wasn't just for you, it was for himself too.

-They gave me everything.

-What do you mean 'they'?

-Sousuke- he left everything to me... in his will. There's also a letter... but I don't want to read it just yet.

-I'm a little stunned, what all did they give you?

-Just a few things.. clothes mostly and his Glock 19. The memory chip fell out of the pocket of one of his pairs of pants. Then there's his money...

-That little bugger never did spend a cent on himself, how much did he have squirreled away? If you don't mind me asking.

-6...

-6 hundered thousand? Wow! That's a lot of dough! We mercenaries make a pretty good living if you don't mind me bragging.

-Umm it's a little more then that Melissa...

-How much more Kaname?

-6.2 million american dollars...

At that number Melissa Mao practically fainted.

-That's $495,378,279.45 yen. But some of that money is going to build a school in a village near a place called Namasak. Do you have any idea why Sousuke would want to do that?

-Hum... I wonder...you never quite knew what was on that kids mind.

-Yeah I guess so...I'm sure he has his reasons.

Kaname sighs wistfully, everyone talked of Sousuke in past tense, Kaname just couldn't get used to it yet.

-Thanks for helping me Mao-san.

-Just call me Melissa, ok? And please Kaname, after you go back to your home and adjust to your life will you contact me and tell me how you're doing?

There was a pleading look in Melissa's eyes like a mother sending her daughter off to college hoping she won't forget poor old mom. She then presses a note with her mailing address on it.

-Just send it here, I promise it will get to me.

After bidding her farewells to the rest of the crew, including Weber who was sulking in the corner of the hallway, Kaname prepared for her 7 hour flight from Hawaii to Japan.


	13. Chapter 13

She arrived home finally. She had to get a spare key from the land lady, but she was happy to see Kaname back. She really didn't know what to expect when she walked into the apartment after being gone for more than a year. She expected the smell of dust and probably would have to get rid of her refrigerator with all the spoiled food that was probably there. She took a deep breath and unlocked the door. She took off her shoes in the front entry way and found that there was a pleasant smell of cleaning liquids. She then walked into the main living area and flipped on the light switch. She didn't remember how big and lonely the place could get. She goes to the fridge and sees that it is empty, someone must have cleaned weekly while she was gone. Plopping herself down on the couch after unpacking her meager belongings she sets out what's left of Sousuke's stuff on the coffee table. She stares down at the note he had written to her.

-_Well now's a good of time as any._

She picks up the letter, carefully opens the seal, and begins to read his heartfelt note.

_Chidori,_

_ There are a lot of things I want to tell you and I don't know if I'll ever get the chance, so I'm writing these thoughts down as they come. First of all if you are reading this letter then you know that I'm dead. I'm sorry for that. I wanted to be able to tell you these things to your face, but now it seems that won't be possible. I wanted to tell you about the kind of man I was before I met you and the person I became after. I was a child of 4 when Andrei Kalinin, then a Spetznaz officer, saved me from a crashed Boeing 747 in the North Pacific. Both of my parents died in that crash, but my mother hung on until the last telling me to "Live. Fight." The memory of my mother's death still haunts me to this day. _

_The Soviet nuclear submarine's rescue action was unauthorized, and later officially denied. Officially there was no Soviet involvement, and thus no rescue operation and no other survivors. Kalinin's efforts to locate any of my living realtives also failed as no record of a passager named "Sagara" existed. No one really knows where the name Sousuke Sagara came from. From there I was taken into the Soviet state child care and eventually picked up by the KGB and placed in a child soldier training program called "Nozh." I killed my first man by the age of 6. By 8 years old I was a trained assassin. I was then transported to Helmajistan to assassinate a local leader of the resistance army. I failed to assassinate my target, and instead was adopted by the man I was sent to kill, General Majhid, who named me Kashim. I became part of the resistance army, fighting against the invading Soviet forces. I learned the use of small arms and basic survival techniques during this time as a guerrilla fighter. It was during this time that I first met Gauron. At the time, Gauron was a mercenary AS instructor at a nearby camp we were neither enemies or allies. Although their meeting at the time seemed inconsequential, it is this meeting with me to have served as an important event that spurred Gauron's obsession with me, whom he deemed a "Killer Saint." I was raised as a guerrilla fighter, I killed many people in those days. I didn't know the worth of human life. After I had killed an enemy I might have spit on them or called them a piece of shit. Leonard was wrong when he said I had killed 100 men. I have killed more then twice that number, and after this final fight there will be more._

It was almost too much for her to bear. She couldn't believe what she was reading. Sousuke had divulged his soul in this letter. All of his history and dark secrets were held in these pages. Her breath came in ragged spurts and she could feel her face getting hot, unshed tears for his miserable past. Dabbing a finger at her eyes she continues to read.

_ I soon became a skilled soldier and AS pilot. During this time, the Soviet offensive grew in magnitude with the fresh success of the new Arm Slaves. In the early stages of the war, Kalinin's forces capture me. This would be the first of many times we are reunited, eventually leading to Kalinin's decision to desert the Soviet army. Kalinin gives specialized Spetznaz training to me, from which I learn Japanese and some Russian. Following the defeat against the Soviet army, I become a mercenary, eventually escaping the country with Kalinin. However, we were separated afterwards in Cambodia. I have since been involved with most of the wars in the Middle East, collectively called the Fifth Middle East War. I made a name for myself as a reliable soldier and eventually even made a few friends. But I am a killer with no remorse. I was eventually scouted and invited to become a private military contractor for the military junta corporation known as Mithril. While showing unspectacular skills at the training camp, my actions in the line of fire with an Rk-92 Savage convinced Melissa Mao to include me and Kurz Weber in the elite SRT unit. It is at Mithril that I am reunited for the second time with Kalinin, this time my commanding officer. As an SRT member I am trained to operate the M9 Gernsback Arm Slave, serving as point-man. I work there for one year before I am put on the most important mission of my life. Protecting you. It's after Gauron told me Kowloon that you were dead that I knew how I felt about you. It was the night you cut my hair that I realized I wanted to have a future with you in it. After you were taken by Leonard Testarossa I began to search for you on my own, but not before re__turning to Jindai High and promising them I would bring you back. A short while later I embark on a trip to__ Namusaku in South East Asia to pick up on a lead I have. It is there I meet a girl, Nami, and her team whom happen to be looking for an experienced AS pilot for their team "Crossbow." I spent several months with them fighting in Arm Slave matches. That was the first time I thought I might be able to live without you. I think in a way I loved her, Nami. She reminded me of you and I thought that maybe I could just stay there and live with her and be happy, but that wasn't ment to be. She was shot to death because of me. Even though she was not involved he killed her. All she wanted was to rebuild her school in the village where she grew up that was destroyed by war._

It was very hard for Kaname to continue reading when she got to the part about Nami, she couldn't believe that Sousuke had feelings for another girl. She continued to press on even with her heart sinking. She read of his exploits while trying to rescue her including the 56 day coma and the shotgun shot to the abdomen. She was amazed that he was still alive after that.

_...and then in Mexico when you called me on that open channel and told me to stop coming after you, I wanted to die at that very instant. I couldn't imagine a world without you in it Chidori. You were my soul reason for fighting and I would do anything in my power to get you back. Then you changed your mind and told me you liked me, I knew instantly that I felt the same way about you. I'm sorry we couldn't kiss, I think I would have really enjoyed that. Since then it's been my goal... to meet you again. And about what happened at Yamsk-11, I knew that it wasn't you who shot me, I knew it all along. I don't want you beating yourself up over it. I forgive you for everything..._

Those few words "I forgive you" meant the world to Kaname. A chill ran down her spine causing her skin to pucker.

…._You were the person that taught me the value of a human life. You taught me happiness, sadness, you gave me back my human heart. I became a different man after meeting you Chidori and for that debt I can never repay you, so I will do what I deem necessary. I am leaving you all of my money so you will never have to worry for the rest of your life. You will be able to live the life you want to, go __anywhere see anything. I want nothing more than your happiness Kaname Chidori, and I am deeply sorry I cannot be there to share these moments with you. I hope you will keep me in your memory and my only wish is for you to live a normal life and be happy again. Tell everyone I'm sorry that I didn't make it back in time for Graduation. And know this one thing Kaname. I love you._

_ Sergeant Sousuke Sagara_

-_Graduation?_

She looks at the calender, the graduation ceremony is tomorrow.

-Maybe I should go...

The sudden urge to see her classmates overwhelms her and she resolutely decides to go to the school tomorrow.


	14. Chapter 14

The morning sun peered through Kaname's window, it was 6:00 time to wake up.

-_Kweh Kaname it's time to get up! Kweh!_

The sound of her old alarm clock startled her out of her fitful slumber, it had been a long time since she had heard that sound. She picks up the rooster alarm clock and holds it in her lap like a pillow.

-_Damn my low blood pressure._

She turned off the alarm after a few more squawks just amused to have the familiar sound back in her ears. She stretches out her joints one by one starting with her legs and working her way up to finally crack the bones in her neck. She hadn't slept well, the sound of that warhead exploding killing the man she loved had resounded throughout her dreams. She dreamed of his past detail by detail, spread out for her in his letter.

-_I killed my first man at 6..._

-_Killer Saint..._

_-I would spit on them and call them worthless pieces of shit._

_-I have killed twice that number...and there will be more..._

She found tear-stains on her pillow, she must have cried most of the night the case was so wet. Thinking about how tragic Sousuke's childhood was made her began to ponder her own past. Sure her father and sister were alive, but they weren't anywhere she could really reach. She held a lot of resentment towards her father Shunya, and while friendly with her younger sister Ayame they had no sisterly bond to speak of.

-_Mom_

She had chosen a world without her mother in it, she chose a world in which Sousuke had to grow up in terrible circumstances, she had chosen this. The feelings of frustration welled up within her, did she do the right thing? At this, she thought, something could be done about this. She would throw away her rejection of her father, and jealousy towards her sister, and be a better child. She wouldn't be able to recreate that peaceful ideal, but she could do at least something. She picks up the receiver and dials her Dad's number in New York. It was 5 pm there so she doesn't expect an answer her father would probably still be at work.

-Hi Dad, Ayame. It's me. I'm sorry to have worried you, but I'm fine now. I'm back at home so call me when you're able to...she trails off, and adds with a curt tone – I love you guys.

She put down the receiver. For some reason, this took all of her remaining energy. She fell down on the sofa, and started thinking. What should she do from now on? Sousuke was gone, Tessa had told her that. She was so resolute when speaking with her, and Kaname, too, listened to her explanation without letting her emotions show. It was as if she had a gaping hole in her heart, but the emotions wouldn't come out. Even now, thinking about the fact that Sousuke had survived everything, including the fight with Belial, but had to die in such a way, didn't strike home. She was the same after losing her mother, but this time it was different, and she didn't understand how. She only constantly felt as if it was a lie. Was this what rejecting reality felt like? However, this feeling was flat, emotionless, and very quiet, as if she was thinking about something very ordinary.

She remembered Leonard.

_-Poor man. I couldn't even answer him, in the end. At least, he followed me until the end, and when I could finally appreciate it, my relationship with him was beyond repair. Fowler and Sabina were the same. And Kalinin... They all had their hopes - and I am the one who rejected them. Living on bearing this burden will be hard._ _And Sofia... Tessa had said that the girl disappeared. That was a lie. She's still here, in a corner of my mind. Sometimes she appears and looks at me. But I don't feel any jealousy or envy from her, no - it feels like she's smiling at something humorous. Telling me to show her how I'll stick by my words, and this world that I chose. She's telling me to make her agree. To fall in love, and let her take over for a while. She thinks she has the right to that. I'm not going to tell her that she's wrong - it's her wish, after all, and I'm not that cold. And, well, I can't really refuse it, since I owe her a little. Well, I'll just have to stick with her for the rest of my life..._

By the time she finished her pondering, the clock read 9:15, it was the day of her graduation, or at least it would have been if things hadn't taken such a turn.

-Graduation... I should at least make an appearance for Kyoko's sake. I haven't even called her to tell her I'm ok yet... Ok! Let's focus. First thing's first, my uniform..

She goes to her closet and finds her Jindai High uniform still hanging in the plastic from the dry cleaners.

Kaname, in her green and white uniform, stood in front of the empty gate of the school, and looked at a large sign above it. The sign read: "Heisei 10, Tokyo Metropolitan Jindai High school Graduation Ceremony." She thought that she should be happy that she made it in time, but what should

she do now? The familiar tune of "Aogeba totoshi" was coming from the gym. So they chose this for the graduation? It certainly set a grave, solemn mood of turning over a page of the students' youth. And at this moment she would show up - someone who had been kidnapped from here after a fight of military robots, involved in the conspiracy of a terrorist organisation, started and stopped the changing of the world... it somehow seemed exceptionally inappropriate. She stood there for untold minutes wondering if she should just go away and not ruin their special day, but then she remembered the memory chip she found in Sousuke's pocket with all of their well-wishes and news for them. She decided that it was time for her to face the reality of the situation whether she liked it or not. She slowly crept to the gymnasium where the ceremony was being held, she thought she might be able to sneak in unnoticed being that she was in her uniform she didn't really stand out from any other student. She quietly and slowly opens the door just wide enough for her body to slip through. All it took was that-

-Hey...isn't that? CHIDORI! -someone shouted.

Oh, she was noticed.

- Chidori-san? There, there she is!

- What, are you serious?

- Chidori? Really?

- Wait, who?..

- Chidori-san! There!

- Woaah, waaah!

The uproar grew and grew, and Kaname didn't know what to do, she was rooted to the spot. The feeling was as though the crowd might be about to throw stones at her, but didn't. Instead they let out a huge roar of-

-WELCOME HOME!

-Kana-Channnn! - it was Kyouko running down the center aisle of the crowed, and now rowdy, gym.

-Ky... Ky... Kyouko! The girl, whom Kaname didn't know how she would be after everything that had happened to her, was smiling.

Without a trace of doubt, or hesitation, she was smiling, and running to embrace Kaname. She didn't understand . A year had passed, and all of -those things- happened. After that, emotions flooded her, like a torrent exploding from within her heart, and as she hugged Kyouko, she began crying. She fell to her knees there and continued weeping, even when all of her classmates from 3-4 came and surrounded them. The teachers also came running and, while they were as shocked as her fellow students, they still managed to quell the turmoil and lead the crowd into the neighbouring courtyard. All of them - her teacher, Kagurazaka, Shiori, Shinji Kazama, Kotarou Onodera, and all of her friends and classmates gathered, some of them smiling, others trying to hold back tears. She was glad no one had really changed.

She was also glad she had chosen to continue in this world. Right, Sofia?

Kaname didn't remember much of what she did and said to her friends in the next few minutes, untill

someone finally said:

-Hey... Where's Sagara-kun?

The crowd went quiet.

- Sousuke...

She didn't know how to explain it. He was the one who had promised to bring her back, and that he did - fighting, by himself.

_-How can I tell them?_

-Yeah Chidori-kun where is Sagara?

Every one began hurling questions at her.

-What happened to you guys?

-Where did you go?

-When did you get back?

She decided that the best way to handle the situation was to go up to the podium and answer their questioning.

-_Let's start with something easy._

She wiped her tears and made her way to stand in front of everyone in the school. She approached the microphone and it sent out an disturbing squeak. She cleared her throat.

-Ahem. Good morning everyone and congratulations on graduating. She began.

-SKIP THE FORMALITIES AND GET TO THE GOOD STUFF! -someone shouted.

- I um... I got home last night around 11 pm...

-WHERE'S SOUSUKE?

-He um.. he's not here... but he's the reason I'm back here safely..

-What happened to him?

-Where is he then?

She couldn't take the barrage of questions about Sousuke it made her hurt too much, so finally she blurted out:

-HE'S DEAD! HE DIED TO SAVE ME...US...THE WORLD! She put a hand to her mouth to stifle the tears and retched breathing.

At that moment the door to the gym bursts open.


	15. Chapter 15

-WHOM IS DEAD?

A man wrapped in bandages from head to toe stood at the door of the gymnasium.

-Hey... isn't that...?

-SOUSUKE!

-HEY IT'S SOUSUKE!

It really was Sousuke.

The crowd was in upheaval once again, some people genuinely happy, others simply astonished. Kaname, however, felt as if she was almost expecting this.

_-Ah, so it was a lie. The guy I love has one redeeming trait, and that's his stubbornness. _

- Well, how's that? I held my promise! I brought her back! - he shouted.

He was breathing heavily, covered with sweat - she didn't know what he did to get here on time. But he, too, had taken the trouble to change into the uniform of a Jindai High student. It was just like him,

sticking to principles. There was a Honda Super Cab laying just outside of the doorway, apparently he had "borrowed" it from some unsuspecting civilian.

His classmates surrounded him as he came closer.

- Sorry I'm late. I was held at the Okinawa base until this morning.

- You're not listening...

- No, I did check that the graduation ceremony was today.

- I said, you're not listening!

Exchanging words with Shinji, Koutarou and the others, Sousuke pushed through the crowd and finally

appeared in front of Kaname.

- I thought you would be here, Chidori.

- Sousuke...

His manner was casual, almost cocky. After staring death in the eye, after all that happened, he came here, and was smiling in that way... why?

- Lots of things happened. There's a lot I want to tell you... not now. I assume you read my letter?

Kaname balled up her fist and struck him across the face.

-You IDIOT! HERE I WAS THINKING YOU WERE NOTHING MORE THAN ASH AND YOU HAVE THE AUDACITY TO COME HERE WITH THAT COCKY SMILE...

She then fisted his shirt as if to pick him up by the collar, but instead buries her head in his chest and begins to softly cry.

-I was so lost Sousuke... I was so worried... I thought I had lost you forever...

- That is naive. You need someone to guard you, - he held out his right hand.

She took it hesitantly, and allowed herself to be led. He stepped forward, then said:

- I will be your guard. Always.

- Wh... you...

She felt her cheeks flush, and her heart start beating faster than ever.

_-How should I answer him?.. _

-I don't hear the whispers anymore, I can't be of val-

-Do you remember our promise? The one from Mexico?

How could she forget? It was the first time they had confessed their true feelings for each other and promised they would kiss when they met again, no matter the place, time, or who was watching. Those were Kaname's words.

-As you can see, this is our reunion.

There was fresh blood seeping through the bandages, he had to have been in a hospital until just this morning. She couldn't tell the extent of the damages but she could tell they were pretty severe.

-Eh? Um... b-but..Sous...Sousuke.. there's...

-You don't like me?

- No, I didn't mean that... but I mean look around!

The entire school was now squeezed into the gymnasium after news had spread of the triumphant return of Kaname Chidori and Sousuke Sagara. It's not that she didn't want to...there were just so many people...

-It's not like I'm against it or anything...

-Then it's not a problem. Sousuke answered typically.

He gently embraced her, and their lips met. Resistance was futile. She didn't know how long it lasted - her head spun, and she was only vaguely aware of what was around her. The remainders of her common sense kept telling her that several hundred people were staring, - then they too threw up the white flag, before the overwhelming realisation that this was what she wished for. She just closed her eyes and surrendered to him. She realised she loved him now more than ever.

_-I don't care anymore! _

Before the astonished audience, she put her arms around his head, and following her heart, clumsily, but

passionately, continued kissing him. The two were completely absorbed in each other among the jeers of

a crowd of students. It was embarassing. Extremely embarassing. Her face burned with shame - but she didn't care.

_-Look if you want to. I've wished for this for a long, long time. He, too. That's all, got any complaints? _

Their lips finally separated, but they still embraced each other, her face close to his.

- ...don't let me go, please...

- I won't.

- Always... always stand by me...

- Of course, - Sousuke, his face sullen as usual, nodded seriously.

- I won't need weapons while you are beside me.

After their reunion the entire student body let out a cheer of approval.

-FINALLY!

-WOOO! GO KANAME AND SOUSUKE!

-YOU'VE BEEN DANCING AROUND EACHOTHER FOR FAR TOO LONG!

Both of their faces flush at the good-natured jeers. After a while the principle takes the stage and settles everyone down from the excitement of the morning's assembly. Consequently, they settled down and Kaname and Sousuke got to enjoy watching all of their friends and classmates receive their diplomas. When the ceremony was concluded everyone wanted to go and celebrate, but Sousuke had to deny them.

-I was in the hospital at the American Naval Base in Okinawa until I broke out of it this morning. He says seriously.

-I'm afraid I'm going to need some rest before I'm up to any 'celebrations.'

-Besides -Kaname interrupts- We have a lot of things we need to talk about. I'll call you later okay Kyouko?

-Yeah that's fine. Besides Ono-D and I have a date after this anyways! She blushes.

Kyouko had certainly changed since the last time Kaname had see her. She no longer wore her hair in childish pigtails, but down- longer than it had been- and traded her glasses for contacts. Apparently she was now dating Ono-D having gotten close to him whilst in the hospital. At first it was because he was assigned to bring her the homework from school, but their friendship had evolved to romance shortly after she had gotten out.

Good-byes being said, Sousuke picks up the Honda Super Cab and proffers Kaname the only helmet.

-I'm afraid there's only one and your safety is top priority.

-Plus you've got enough cushion wrapped around your head! She giggled at his bandaged visage wondering how he managed to escape like that.

-_He's back. He's the same as ever._

She accepts the helmet and settles onto the back of the bike wrapping her arms securely around his waist, nuzzling her face into his back as the cycle accelerates.


	16. Chapter 16

The ride back to where their apartments were located was fairly quiet. They were both content with just being in each other's presence no words needed to be said, there would be plenty of time for talking when they got back home. Sousuke pulls up in front of the Mansion K apartments where Kaname lives.

-I must return this motor-vehicle back to it's rightful place. He says staunchly.

-Alright, I'll go with you.

-No, it's fine. It's just around the corner I will be back in apporximately 300 seconds.

-Okay, just let yourself in when you return.

She waves him off and he gives her a salute. She rushes upstairs to clean up her place a little and spruce herself up. She had a feeling it was going to be a long night. She went to the refrigerator to what she should make for dinner, then remembering that she had no food, decided they would order-in. She pulls out several door-hangers with different restaurants on them and chose a sushi-delivery deciding that it was a special occasion after all. She places an order and looks at her watch.

10 minutes had passed.

-_Where is he?_

After a few more minutes she begins to worry. Putting on her shoes she decides to wait for him downstairs. She gets in the elevator and presses the button for the ground floor. She stands just in front of the gate and waits for him.

20 minutes have passed.

She starts to get anxious, hoping that something hasn't happened.

-Maybe it was further away than he though- she mutters.

After a while a man in uniform comes up with what appears to be their food. Kaname pays, thanks the man, and rushes to put the food in the fridge. At this point she is becoming frantic.

She again pushes the button for the elevator, but this time it's taking too long. She throws open the door to the stairwell and begins to descend. Approximately 37 stairs down is a man passed out on the ground. It's Sousuke and he's bleeding heavily a small pool of blood already gather around his head.

-SOUSUKE! She screams.

She kneels before him and puts his bloody head in her lap.

-Sousuke! Get ahold of yourself!

-Kaname?

-Yes I'm here.

-Help me to your apartment. I think I can manage.

She helps him to his feet carrying most of his weight on her shoulder.

-Listen to me, my wounds were more severe than I originally thought, and the walk back has caused them to open up. I need you to call an ambulance as soon as we get back to your apartment. My body may go into shock but don't be scared, I will be okay if the paramedics get here soon.

She is shaking and tears are pouring down her face. Who knows what he went through to get there this morning? He was still fighting to get to her all this time. His feet are barely moving as they reach the entrance to her floor, his feet are mostly dragging and he's going in and out of consciousness. Kaname kicks the door open to her apartment and carefully helps Sousuke to lie down in the entry way. She runs straight to the phone and dials 119.

-Yes my boyfriend has been involved in an accident, my apartment is 436 Mansion K Apartments Chofu City. Please Hurry.

As she is talking to the operator she is scurrying to get her first-aid kit and supplies. She then rushes back to Sousuke's side and places down a bowl of water, towels, and her first-aid kit. She begins by cleaning up the blood on his face and then to change the bandages on his head. With each turn, more and more of his injuries showed. His face was bruised and burned almost beyond recognition on one side his hair had been burned off and then it was shaved because he had apparently been privy to brain surgery. Her hands are shaking and the bandages fall out of her grasp. He gently grabs her shaking hand.

-I love you Kaname, I promise I won't leave you...I...

At that he falls into a deep unconsciousness. Seconds later the paramedics arrive. They begin asking her questions as they begin their work.

-How did he get in this state?

-_I don't know.._

_-_Why is this man not in the hospital?

-_He was until this morning..._

_-_Is he allergic to any medications?

-_I don't think?_

She then places her hands to her ears as the barrage of questions is flung in her face with little to no answer for any of the questions. They have him bagged and he is breathing but severely injured, the paramedics telling her he must have just gotten out of the operating room in the last 20 hours and all of his incisions had opened up. They would be lucky if they made it to the hospital in time.


	17. Chapter 17

It took 8 hours and 4 pints of blood but the surgery was finally finished. Sousuke was placed in the ICU and Kaname, since he had no family to speak of, was allowed to visit.

-Oh Sousuke, why did you not tell me? Why do you always keep these things to yourself?

He had a multitude of wires and tubes coming out of him from everywhere. She waited for him to wake. Hours turned into days, days to weeks, and finally it was the start of the new school year. Kaname would be attending Jindai High as a re-peat second year student. She had already registered, but wasn't looking forward to going to school without Sousuke and all of her old friends. She basically moved into Sousuke's hospital room leaving it only to sleep and prepare meals. She was there at 5 in the morning the first day of school. She sat in her usual chair and took hold of Sousuke's hand.

-Wish me luck, I start back at school today.

A lot of the swelling had gone down in his face and head, but the bruises and burns were still prevalent. His hair was beginning to grow back and she ran her fingers through the unruly tufts.

-I love you Sousuke. She whispers. Wake up soon.

The school day goes as it normally would, though she knew no one in her class now. Several classmates came up to her during the day wanting to know about Sousuke and their adventures, but she told them she really wasn't in the mood to talk about it so they left her alone. She ate lunch by herself and went straight to the hospital after school was over. She did not volunteer to be class rep. this time, not wanting the responsibilities. The days drag on each one without Sousuke feeling longer than the last. The weeks pass by swiftly turning into months. By the 6th month the doctors tell Kaname it is likely he will never wake up.

-What?

-It's your choice, you can keep him on life support or we can pull the plug, the shock may wake him up but there's no way to be sure.

-Can I have some time to think about this?

-Of course.

- We have a new intern that will be taking over Sagara-san's welfare.

-When may I meet them?

-Well here he is right now!

A man in a white lab coat is coming straight for them, he looks somewhat familiar.

-This is him, Shojiro Fuwa. He's in his second year of pre-med and has started an internship with our hospital, he will take good care of Sagara-san I can assure you.

-Fuwa-sempai? Kaname can barely believe her eyes.

-Chidori?

They blink at each other a few times.

-What brings you here?

-I'm taking care of a friend.

Fuwa then begins to go over Sousuke's charts which the previous doctor hands him. A concerned look splays across his features.

-This friend of yours...the prognosis doesn't look too good. There's one thing I don't understand? How can he have slight radiation poisoning?

-Ah-ha ha.. yeah I don't really know about that... She trails off not knowing how much information she should withhold.

They sit down for a while and catch up, he only stays for twenty minutes but promises to return on his lunch break.

-That guy won't be going anywhere for a while. He jokes. It's nice that you're taking care of your friend Kaname.

-_Should I have said that Sousuke was more than just a friend?_

She isn't sure how to feel, after hearing what the doctors had to say about his condition.

-_What if he never wakes up?_

She feels devastated by the news of having to decide wether or not to pull the plug on Sousuke's life support. She's torn, she wants to see if the shock will wake him up, but if it doesn't... well she doesn't know what to do if he doesn't.

So a daily routine begins, with Kaname showing up to the hospital at 5am to spend some time with Sousuke before school starts. Fuwa-sempai usually joins her when he arrives to work at 6 to eat his breakfast with her before going on his shift. She is back after school and Fuwa is there for his daily assessments, they usually dine in the cafeteria for dinner together before visiting hours are over and Kaname is forced to go back home. After a couple of months of this has passed, Kaname is growing extremely tired of eating hospital food, so she decides to start making breakfast for herself before she goes for her usual visit.

-Wow Kaname-chan that smells good! Fuwa states with hunger in his eye as he looks down at his cafeteria made breakfast.

-Well it's just as easy to cook for two..so why don't I make you breakfast starting tomorrow?

She was growing used to Fuwa always being around close by. She enjoyed her casual chats with him, explaining to him that because of "family issues" she had to repeat her second year. She could just let go and smile when she was around him he was only a little older so it was more like being around her old friends from school instead of a doctor/patient relationship. In fact it was more then that and it was growing day by day. He made her feel like a normal girl again, no militaristic obsessions, no danger, just a normal guy who cared. It was on the day that Sousuke had been in the hospital for one year that it happened. They were walking outside in the rehabilitative gardens when they turned a corner Fuwa grabbed Kaname's hand.

- Kaname I... I have something I would like to ask you... but I need you to do something for me first.

-Fuwa-sempai I don't under-

-Will you pull the plug on that man?

-What?

-Will you pull the plug on that man?

-Fuwa-sempai what are you saying? I can't just do that to my... my...

-Your what?

-My! M-my... I don't really know... I don't really know anymore sempai. What should I do?

-If you just leave him like that because you can't let go... well I think it's just inhumane. His spirit will be trapped inside that vegetable of a body until you decide if you can let go. And if he wakes up, well then isn't that better for you? And if he doesn't and this is goodbye- then will you marry me

Kaname-san? I knew for a very long time it was you who I was meant to be with, I think meeting up like this was fate in a way, don't you?

-_He's right. I can't just keep him alive for my own selfish reasons. I have to make a decision and I have to make it now._

_-_Yes. She said in a small voice.


	18. Chapter 18

-_If I can't be happy with him... maybe I can find happiness with this man._

-Yes. She said in a small voice.

-Then I think it's time Kaname-san.

-Yes...time...

He reaches out a hand to her and she shakily takes his hand, if people saw them walking like this it would look like they were a couple. He firmly grips Kaname's hand as he leads her back to Sousuke's room. There has been no change in his condition, all of his wounds have healed and his hair has grown back nicely, it just appears as if he is sleeping. Kaname let's go of Fuwa's hand and walks over to where Sousuke is laying.

-You lied to me this time you idiot. You told me it's not a problem, but you didn't come back. Kaname bitterly chides as she grasps his hand and puts his fingers to her face.

-Can you give us a few minutes please? She pleads with tears in her eyes.

-Of course Kaname-san.

She looks down on Sousuke's stoic features, the form of his jaw line, his chestnut colored hair, and the thing that made him, him, his cross shaped scar.

-It's going to be okay now Sousuke. You don't have to suffer anymore. I loved you all the way through it, but now I must find my own happiness for my own reasons. Just please- if you can hear me, show me a sign.

Nothing.

She bit back tears as she placed a tender kiss on the corner of his lips.

-I forgive you for all the bad things Sousuke, and I love you for the man you are, but I can't keep you here if it's not meant to be so...Fuwa-sempai?

-Yes Kaname-san?

-I think I'm ready... she says with a faltering voice.

Kaname is holding Sousuke's hand with one hand and Fuwa's hand in the other. Fuwa slowly begins to unplug the machines that have been keeping Sousuke alive. The last machine he unplugs is the life-support system, he pulls the breathing apparatus from his throat as the heartbeat grows weaker, Sousuke's hand grows heavier in her own. Finally there is the sound of flat-lining and Kaname drops his hand. She balls both of her fists into Fuwa's lab coat, she looks up at him with sorrow. He seems to look at something briefly, then turns back to Kaname.

-I love you Kaname Chidori...will you be my wife?

- I...I suppo-

She looked shocked as he then leans forward and kisses her.

-What kind of shit is this?- a gravely voice rasps.

-_I know that voice..._

-I said what the FUCK is _this _SHIT?

-Sousu-

-Get out.

-What?

- I said get out. I don't want to see your face.

She doesn't even realize that Shojiro is still holding onto her.

-LET GO OF ME YOU CREEP! She screams as she knees Fuwa in the face.

-Sousuke please let me explain!

-I'm asleep for a few hours and you find somebody else? What's there to explain Kaname?

-A few hours? Sousuke you-

-Had enough. Please leave my room.

-But I've been waiting...

-With that guy you went on a date with? Fuwa-sempai is it?

-Oh no, Sousuke! It isn't what it seems like! She falls on her knees beside his bed and grabs up his hand.

-Then what was this "I loved you all the way through it" crap?

-You know I lo-

-But now I have to_ find_ _my own happiness with my own reasons. _Feh- he looks at her with disdain in his eyes.

-I know it. I said those things. She hated having those horrible words thrown back in her face, words she really didn't mean in the first place.

-Then go.

-I don't think you fully grasp the situation Sousuke.

-Spare me the details Chidori.

-No by situation I mean how long you were asleep...

-I assume it was a few hours at most.

-And what gave you _that_ idea?

-You're still in your uniform. He states flatly.

-Sousuke you've been asleep for a year.

It was his turn to be incredulous.

-Chidori that seems highly unlikely...

-But such is the case. Fuwa retorts as he rises up off the floor and wipes the blood of his nose from Kaname's swift knee to the face.

His eyes grew wide at that revelation. He began trying to move his muscles but found it incredibly hard.

-So Sousuke you have to believe me when I say they told me you might never wake up, they left the decision up to me as to what to do and it took me a long time to come to a conclusion.

- And that conclusion was to let me die so you could be happy with someone else?

-NO! That wasn't what I was thinking... I mean it's not really what I was feeling...

-Then what?

-I didn't want to keep you alive for my own selfish reasons, not to continuing to live like that, if you would have seen yourself Sousuke...

Tears welled up in her eyes as she remembered something, Kyouko Tokiwa had taken pictures of Sousuke with her digital camera every time she came to visit.

-_Kyouko why are you taking pictures of Sousuke like this? _

_Kaname had yelled at her best friend as she took shot after shot of Sousuke as soon as he was out of surgery._

_-Well I think he might want to see himself like this. She had said. Maybe he won't do something that dangerous anymore after seeing these pictures._

_-You know what Kyouko I think you're right. Kaname had conceded to her friends camera fetish a long time ago. _

_Every time Kyouko came to visit, which was once a week at first, then turned into once a month she brought good tidings to Sousuke from Shinji and Ono-D and would sometimes bring them along. She had made a scrapbook of his progression through the healing process along with captions of the news and medical jargon she heard from Kaname. Kaname would have to show him this._

-Can I show you?

-Show me what?

-What it was like from my side while you were asleep.

-Roger, but isn't that besides the point?

-What's the point then Sousuke?

-What were you feeling?

-Lost without you mostly, but then I also thought that if you were going to wake up you were going to need a fighters wake up call.

-I see.

-I love you Sousuke and nothing will ever change that.

-Ahem. Um I guess since the patient is now awake I need to give him a through physical and mental examination. If you will please step outside Kaname-san.

-Hey it's Chidori-kun to you bub. She blurts out.

She then retreats to the hallway so the doctor can get to work and she can call Kyouko.


	19. Chapter 19

-Kyouko?

-Oh, hi Kana-chan!

-Can you come to the hospital and bring Sousuke's scrap book? Her voice was trembling from all of the emotions.

-Sure, what for?

-_It _happened.

-Oh Kana-chan... you don't mean he... Kyouko began to feel tears well up in her eyes for her friend's sake.

-Yes he-

-Died?

-NO! He woke up...

-What! Kyouko couldn't believe what she was hearing, Sousuke after a year of being in a coma has finally awakened.

-Yeah it's fantastic isn't it?

-What made him wake up?

-Uh, about that...Actually, Fuwa-sempai asked me to marry him today.

-What...

Kaname's friend was actually speechless for once. She knew that he had become Sousuke's attending physician, but had no idea they were in _that_ kind of a close relationship.

-But there was something he asked me to do first.

-Kana-chan you don't mean?

-Yes Kyouko, he asked me to pull the plug on Sousuke and if he didn't live to become his wife.

-You said no right?

-Actually I was on the verge of accepting when I heard his voice. I thought he had died, but you know Sousuke never taking the easy way out. She laughs. It was a pretty bad scene to wake up to. But here's the kicker, he thought he had only been asleep for a few hours! Can you believe that? He I am sitting with him day in and day out for a year suffering, and he thinks he's been out a few hours! Geez what an idiot. She chuckles despite herself.

-Can you come then?

-Yeah I can but I have to run a few errands first. Kyouko says slyly.

-What are you planning Ky?

-Oh, nothing _really_ just a few things to pick up...fuh hu hu...

-Ok but nothing to noisy or that will excite him too much, he's very weak...

-I understand Kaname. See you in a couple hours, besides you two need some time to talk I'm sure.

-Ok see-ya!

Kaname hangs up her cell phone and leans back against the wall just on the other side of the hallway from Sousuke's room.

-_Knowing her she'll probably bring Ono-D and Shinji-kun. That's fine with me as long as they don't make too much noise._

Then Fuwa opens the door to Sousuke's room and steps just outside.

-Um Chidori-kun? Can I speak to you briefly.

-If it's about your proposal then the answer is NO. She crosses her arms against her chest and blows air at her bangs.

-No it's about the mental state of Sagara-san.

-His mental state? What about it?

-Well it's a little strange. When I asked him if he remembered what happened that brought him here he said, "That information is classified. You do not have the necessary security clearance to hear the explanation." And things of that nature.

Kaname blinks a few times.

-Doesn't seem like anythings wrong with him to me.

-Are you saying he always speaks in such a manner?

-As long as I've known him. She giggles at how otaku Sousuke can sound to outsiders.

-Well there are many things that he's going to have to relearn how to do.

-What do you mean?

-He's going to have to learn how to walk again, how to write, to tie his shoes. This is just the first step, it's going to be a difficult thing to come back from, and it's going to be a long road to recovery.

- I understand Fuwa-sempai, and I'll be there to motivate him every step of the way! She held up two fingers in the "V" sign. And um... I'm sorry Shojiro-kun. She said akwardly. I didn't mean to hurt you.

-It's fine Kaname-san. He sighed. I knew he was someone you must have cared for dearly from the beginning. It's rare to find someone who stays so close to someone in a coma for so long, you were here every minute you could be for 6 months before I even took over his case. I can't really blame you, but why didn't you tell me he was more than just a friend?

-I well... It's never been official... so I didn't really know if I should say it... but I did know how he feels about me. And well... Sorry for everything, but I do really enjoy spending time with you. Let's stay friends.

They give each other a good natured handshake and Fuwa goes off to see about his other duties. Kaname quietly opens the door to Sousuke's room and lets herself in.

-Hey.

-Hey yourself.

-How are you feeling?

-You mean besides not being able to move? Fine I guess.

-I know it's going to be hard Sousuke but I'll be here with you every step of the way.

-And so will _he._ He spit out the word.

-It wasn't like that Sousuke, I mean I guess it was, but I didn't really want to be with him...

-So that's why you were agreeing?

-I WASN'T AGREEING!

-You can't lie to me Kaname, I saw everything.

-Everything?

-Affirmative.

She plops herself down on her usual chair by his bedside and picks up his hand.

-I'm sorry Sousuke, I just didn't know what the right thing to do was. I didn't want you to suffer anymore, I didn't want to suffer anymore. I figured that if you were going to die, then at least I deserved to try to find a little happiness with someone else and I guess I just happened to pick someone who was close by who I could talk to.

He frowned at this.

-I told you I'd be fine, you didn't believe me?

-But you weren't Sousuke! You weren't fine! There was so much blood... they didn't know if they were going to make it to the hospital in time... What happened to you? Why were you like that in the first place! She felt like belting him.

-I... Well... Just before the warhead exploded AL tried something...he attempted to link his core unit directly into the main system. This only protected us from the initial explosion, but running the Lambda Driver intermittently later protected us from the radiation... I was badly injured from the explosion, charred flesh, lacerations, fractured skull, slight brain swelling... But I managed to stay alive because I wanted to meet you no matter what. After a few days, the U.S. Naval forces came to inspect the island. That's when they found me and AL. I was then transferred from the Navy intelligence to the CIA. This was, of course, quite troublesome, but then Congressman Spear of the Senate Select Committee on Intelligence stepped in and snatched me away. While I was in the hospital unit for most of my stay, they then transferred me to the American Naval to a base called Kadena. They kept me in confinement and as soon as I was recovered enough, they planned to make me talk. It seems that the retirements of Mithril received information on my whereabouts and planned to break me out, but I already had plans of my own. I managed to take down a second Lieutenant of the USAF by...

Kaname was speechless. Even after getting hit with a nuclear warhead he had been through so much.

-...and so I created a diversion on the north-west side of the base. I had already made sure to secure AL in the process. I then subdued two enemy assailants and commandeered their truck. As I was making my escape I came across some familiar faces...

_Then they saw a lone truck driving away from the scene of the explosion, to the east, then passing the _

_base perimeter, and heading right towards them at full speed. _

_- Hey, wait a... _

_The truck passed them at full speed, and as the light fell for an instant on the vehicle, they saw that in the driver's seat was none other than Sousuke Sagara. _

_- Sousuke..? _

_Fifty meters on the truck screeched to a halt, then changed gear, reversed and stopped near them. _

_- What are you doing here? _

_That familiar, sullen face, the same mouth with its edges always turned down. Sousuke kept the engine running. He was covered in bandages from head to toe. It seemed like a lot happened before he finally escaped. The four people- Kurz, Clouseau, Mao, and Wraith staring at him as if he was an apparition, hurriedly got out of the car. _

_- Well... we were here to get you out... _

_- I see. Hm. _

_Seeing Kurz, who was trying to get out of the back seat, Sousuke frowned. _

_- Oh. So you're alive. _

_- What, is that all you can say? _

_- You're as spoiled as usual. _

_- ...and you're awful... _

_Chaos reigned in the base behind them, but it was only a matter of time before they were discovered. _

_- There's no time. I've got some things to do, so I'll be taking the car, - said Sousuke curtly, and started _

_getting into the driver's seat of the Humvee. _

_- W-...what? _

_- Thank you. Please let the sergeant go, - said a synthetic voice from the truck's dashboard. _

_- ...Al? _

_They saw that the AI's core unit was in the rear of the truck, along with a power supply and some other machinery. _

_- It would've been easy for me to escape alone, but to take this guy along I had to go through a lot of _

_trouble. _

_- I am grateful Sergeant. _

_Amazing, outrageous perseverance. It made them, who for several weeks thought they would never see him again, look like a bunch of dolts. _

_-_And that's the morning of the Graduation ceremony, you kind of know what happened from there. He states blandly.

-Sousuke...you.. you...! She felt rage welling up in her chest at how stupid he had been, to run to her side in such a condition was reckless at best.

- I wanted to complete my mission at all costs.

-Your _mission_? That's what you cared about?

-Yes Chidori, my personal mission.

-Which was?

-To be by your side and protect you for the rest of your life. He stated bluntly.

A flush began to rise in her cheek.

-Sousuke, I- I-

-You _what _ Kana-chan?

Kaname whips around to find Kyouko Tokiwa, Shinji Kazama, and Koutarou Onodera along with several other people from her old class at Jindai High. They all pop party streamers at her and Sousuke. The couple looks at each other in bewilderment.

-CONGRATUALTIONS ON YOUR RECOVERY SOUSUKE! They all chime in.

-I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO NOT BE TOO NOISY KYOUKO! Kaname bellows.

-I think you're the noisy one Chidori-kun. Ono-D snipes. Everyone laughs.

They had brought Sousuke a plethora of snacks, get well cards, balloons, some even carried flowers.

-We won't stay long... The voice of their homeroom teacher, Eri Kagurazaka, whispered, carrying the form of her sleeping child.

-Thank you every one. I feel much better already. Sousuke said philosophically.

They only stayed for an hour but everyone had something they had wanted to say to him. As everyone left the impromptu party Kyouko pulls Kaname aside. She hands her a scrapbook.

-Here's the thing you wanted, I figured it was something that you two wanted to do alone. Kyouko gave her friend a small smile and a quick hug before grabbing onto her boyfriend and walking out of the hospital room.


	20. Chapter 20

The days passed in quick succession as Sousuke began to recover. He spent most of his time in physical therapy re-training his muscles to do even the smallest thing. He had never felt so weak before in his life, he literally couldn't do anything on his own. Kaname did most of what he needed when she was there, but being back in school cut out much of the time he had during the day. She knew how hard it must be for him to ask for help like that, to be basically defenseless is not something Sousuke is accustomed to and she can see it taking its toll on him in his eyes.

-Sousuke?

-Hum?

-I love you.

-Thank you Kaname, but I must be a burden on you.

-What? Sousuke you could never be a burden to me! She tried to keep her composure, she hated it when he got like this.

-I'm no good to you like this.

-You're getting better...I know it's tough Sousuke but please try to bare it. Once you're better, you'll be back to yourself in no time! She tried to put on a smile for him but it was hard to see him like this.

He weakly tossed his head back against the pillow, looking away from her. His eyes were deep in thought like he was in a distant past reliving his memories.

-It would have been better if I died, as I am now I'm nothing but a worthless sack of meat taking up valuable resources. There was dead honesty in his voice.

-_It makes me mad to hear him talk this way._

She begins to cup his cheek in her hand but he turns his head away.

-Fine then. Give up. See if I care. She was shaking with rage.

He remained silent.

-Who do you think you are? The Sousuke I know _never _gives up, even if everyone else already has. He would never go around crying about how it isn't fair. She drops her head so her bangs are hanging in her eyes, she doesn't want him to see her cry.

- I'm going home.

-Kaname wait...

-No.

-Please stay.

-Make me.

She picks up her things and begins to walk out of the door. Before she reaches the handle something stops her from behind. He was on the floor, arm outstretched, holding onto her ankle.

-Sou-su-ke?

He released her ankle to push himself up on his elbows. Already sweat was pouring down his forehead. He then slowly and deliberately pushed himself onto his knees sliding his upper-body to a seated position. Kaname's eyes widen at the sight before her. He has finally drawn himself upwards and was taking a shaky step forward.

-Sousuke! You're... you're... all by yourself?

As he begins to take another step he feels his muscles screaming at him, about to give out at any minute, and falters slightly. She's there in an instant to catch him, tears of joy streaming down her face.

-Whom has given up? He says with a slight cockiness to his voice, his arms now wrapped around her for support.

She pulls back from him face flushed bright red, this is the first real physical contact they've had since the kiss. She looks up into his war hardened face and sees nothing but love for her written in his eyes.

-Aishiteru yo. He mumbles a blush growing hot on his face as well.

They stand there a moment just enjoying each other's presence before heavy lidded eyes turn into a sweet and passionate kiss. After several moments of amorous kissing, Sousuke's strength begins to give way and Kaname helps him back into bed. After that it became a routine. Sousuke pushes him self to the limit every day to walk her to the door and give her a kiss before she has to go home, the kiss lasting longer and longer every day. It's not long before he is up and walking on his own after that. He would push his limits every day doing things the physical therapists thought insane. Including some of his Spetznaz training which included setting off bombs and leaping to avoid the explosions, alighting the building, crazy feats of strength and perseverance.

-This is an unsatisfactory rehabilitation center. He states flatly.

-SOUSUKE... Kaname raises her fist in anger and pulls out her harisen. She begins beating him over the head with it.

-WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT...about...he heh! She begins to break down in a fit of laughter.

-It's good to have you back to your normal self Sousuke! She smiles up at him knowing it won't be long before he's going home.


	21. Chapter 21

It isn't long before the papers are signed and Sousuke is released from the hospital with a clean bill of health and a rather large medical bill to boot what with all the chaos he had wreaked since his 4 months of wakefulness. The ride down to the lobby irritates him because he has to be in a wheelchair for the duration. They open the door to the cab for him and he gets in with a joyful Kaname by his side.

-We're finally going home! She chirps.

-Affirmative.

It's not a long drive from the hospital to the Mansion K apartments where Kaname lives. It's 9 o'clock on Sunday morning and Kaname doesn't have a care in the world now that Sousuke is finally back to himself. The cab driver opens the door for the couple and pulls their few possessions from the trunk. Sousuke attempts to grab the bags but Kaname is there before him.

-You don't need to be doing stuff like this yet!

-I can assure you, while I may not be a peak physical condition yet, I am able to carry a bag.

He gently takes the bag from Kaname.

-Besides I have to check on the safe house Chidori, it's beentoo long.

-I'll come with you!

-Negative. I'll be at you're place in exactly 300 seconds.

-I've heard that one before Sousuke and this time there's _no way_ I'll let you out of my sight.

She grabs his hand and intertwines their fingers, gently pulling him in the direction of his apartment. They wait patiently for the very slow elevator and Kaname hums a tune to herself quietly.

-Two years hu?

-Two years. I still find it hard to believe I was in a coma for a year though.

They make their way down the familiar corridor to Sousuke's room, he takes out his set of keys and puts it in the door. The lock won't turn.

-Stay back Chidori the safe house might have been compromised!

He immediately kicks the door in and pulls out his Glock 19, which Kaname had brought to him in the hospital, and aims it in the room. Kaname stands at the door, bewilderment written on her face as she sees two little girls playing with dolls and a tea set sitting in the middle of the floor. They begin to cry in sheer terror at the man who has burst into their home.

-SOU-SU-KE~ Kaname breathed. She pulled out her harisen and smacks him across the face and about the head several times shouting.

-WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT PULLING OUT YOUR GUN LIKE THAT! THIS IS A PEACEFUL COUNTRY SOUSUKE! THEY PROBABLY FIGURED YOU WEREN'T COMING BACK SO THEY RENTED IT OUT!

-But what about all my equipment?

-They probably have it in storage somewhere...either that... or the police have it as evidence.

-Hum. Where am I supposed to sleep then?

At this question it's Kaname's turn to blush.

-Well I figure you could stay at my place.

-I wouldn't want to be an inconvenience.

At this they turn to see a very angry woman standing in the front room.

-I'M CALLING THE POLICE!

-Heheh well you see ma'am my friend here used to live in this apartment and...

-HE PULLED A GUN ON MY DAUGHTERS!

-I'm very sorry ma'am, that was a miscalculation, I'm willing to receive any reprimand you deem necessary. He stands at attention.

-Well, oh my you're a very _interesting _boy... I _suppose_ I can let it go just this once.

Kaname lets out a sigh of relief not wanting to have another disaster before they got to spend a quiet evening together at home. With one more apology they set back on their way to Kaname's apartment to have an oh-so-important night alone. She cracks her knuckles over her head and blows air at her bangs.

-I'm glad _that's_ over with!

She puts the key in the lock opens the door and turns on the light.

-Tadaima! She calls. Come on Sousuke you too!

-Tadaima. He mumbles, the words being unaccustomed.

-O-kaeri nasai! Kaname responds, afterwards turing around and giving him a sweet welcome home kiss.

He blushed as Kaname pressed her lips harder against his. He dropped the bags and cupped the back of her head, fingers tangling in her hair. A moment passes and she gently pushes back from him to look him in the eye.

-I could get used to this.

-Yes. I can't explain this feeling, but yes I could too.

They look deeply into each other's eyes both blushing heavily.

~Gurrrr

Sousuke's stomach growls. Kaname pushes him away and says with a humph

-Way to ruin the mood Sousuke!

And almost as if in response:

~Gurrrr

Her stomach growls too, putting a cocky smirk on Sousuke's face.

-Uh.. why don't I cook something? Is curry rice okay with you? She knew it was Sousuke's favorite.

-That sounds delightful. He says with his usual deadpan expression.

She almosts bursts her seams when she heard it.

-S-s-since whe-when do you use w-w-words like...DELIGHTFUL!? HA! HA!

He looked down at his now slippered feet.

-I just wanted to you know how pleased that would make me...

Kaname finishes laughing it up and wipes a few tears from her eyes. She puts a hand to Sousuke's shoulder.

-Sousuke you really _have_ changed!

He places a slightly trembling hand against hers.

-I would not have changed had I not met you.

He pulls her close and wraps his arms around her lithe body. She was the part of him that made him human again. She was a bright light in his dark world of horrors. She accepted him for everything he was good, bad, or otherwise. He gently caresses her cheek. There were things that needed to be said, unspoken things between them. Nami, of course being the most untouched subject. He knew she had read the letter, the one in which he bared his soul. He told her of his crimes against humanity, how he had killed women and children when he was in Afghanistan fighting as a guerrilla. He had killed to survive and he was good at it, for that he had no remorse, especially when it came to protecting her. After holding her for several minutes he placed his hands on her shoulders, pushed her slightly away and let out a sigh.

-What's wrong Sousuke?

-Chidori there are some matters we need to address. He stated nervously.

-What kind of matters?

-Um.. well, I'd like to talk to you about that document.

-Oh. She looks down to her pink sneakers. That.

She dips her head down so her bangs hide her face, fisting her hands into Sousuke's shirt.

-Yeah I guess there are some things we should talk about... but first let's eat. She smiles up at him.

There is quiet in the apartment as Kaname goes about preparing the ingredients for her famous curry. Sousuke just wanders about the living room listlessly, there are so many things to say, where should he begin?

_-I suppose I start at the beginning and go to the end. It's just like a debriefing._

After about an hour she's done and serves out two heaping helpings to herself and Sousuke. Sitting down to his plate she can tell that he is deep in thought. Not much is said during the meal except for:

-Thank you Kaname, it's delicious.

After the meal is done Kaname goes to pick up the dishes to wash them whenhe suddenly picks her up and takes her into the bedroom to sit on her bed, this is an intimate place, maybe he could talk openly here. She folds her hands in her lap and looks seriously at Sousuke.

-I'm ready to listen if you're ready to talk.

-I don't really know where to begin. First I would like to say no matter how you feel after I've said what I need to say it's still my mission to protect you, to be by your side, is my number one priority. I'm not good with words or feelings Chidori and so I hope you will try to hear me out.

As he takes a breath she raises her hand.

-Can I ask questions?

-Affirmative. I will probably be asking you some questions as well Chidori.

-Ok I'm ready, and Sousuke?

-Yes?

-No matter what... I still love you.

He smiles at her sincerity, a small smile passing across her features as she takes his hand in hers. At least she is willing to listen and I don't think she'll get angry. After everything that had happened Kaname was rarely getting mad at Sousuke anymore. She was showing her gentler side since he had been hurt. She in turn was trying to be more honest with herself and her feelings, now that she knew how he felt, there was no reason to be jealous anymore, no need to worry he wasn't looking at her.

-Well then I guess I'll debrief you. He felt his palms growing sweaty not knowing where to begin. When I was 4 years old, Kalinin saved me from an airplane crash in which both of my parents died. I was taken into Nozh by the age of 5 and by 6 I had killed my first man.

Kaname winced at that, she looked into his eyes and saw the shadows of the past playing across them. She knew it hurt him to talk of his past, she knew he had no fond childhood memories only war, fighting, killing, surviving. She shuddered at what he had to do.

- I was 6 years old, I had disrespected my superior and was forced to stand outside in a blizzard for many hours with little clothes on. I finally had had enough, I was a small child and didn't know how to train my body, and went in to warm up. My superior saw me and said that if I couldn't follow simple orders I was a waste of flesh. He gave me a knife and said If you want to live then you'll have to kill me first. He came at me and stabbed me in the side. While he was trying to get his knife out of my body, I pushed my way into the hilt so I could slit his throat. This was a man not a boy, at least 3 times my age. I had no remorse for killing him, though I do remember being frightened for my life as a child. It was when I was 7 that I knew I had a knack for killing and the games of war.

She couldn't believe what she was hearing but she knew if it was Sousuke it had to be true. He told her many stories of the things he was forced to do as a child to survive.

-In Afghanistan I was forced to steal children from their beds to become child soldiers or kill them if they refused. Children older than me, younger than me, boys, girls, it didn't matter. I was forced to do unspeakable things in order to live Chidori, I don't know if you'll ever be able to understand the nature or extent of my crimes against humanity, but I hope you can forgive me for them.

The tears were streaming down her face, she couldn't hold them back. The descriptions made her sick she had seen people killed by Sousuke's hand, but she had known they were bad people, not innocent children. He told her of how he and Kalinin met and were enemies for a while, then when Sousuke was defeated, he took the boy in and trained him. He told her of how they were separated in Cambodia and how he became a mercenary after that. He told her of how he came to be at Mithril and the things that took place before she met him. She didn't ask questions, only listened.

-And that's when I was assigned to you Chidori. He takes a deep breath after letting everything out. Do you have any questions thus far?

-Did you enjoy killing those people at that time?

-I did not enjoy it as much as it was a sense of duty.

-Were you proud of yourself after killing them?

-I felt a certain pride in completing my mission, yes.

-Do you regret killing those children?

-No. I had to do it to survive.

-I see.

She didn't know what to think, yes she had read the letter but it was more an overview of his life rather than down to the details. She looked at him as if she had never seen him before, never knew this man. She felt bitter tears well up in her chest at the thought of those innocent children. He knew it would be hard on her to hear the details straight from him, but he didn't know it would be this hard. She looked as if she expected him to treat her brutally, to maim her in some way. He took his hand to cup her cheek and she flinched away.

-I'm sorry Chidori, I'm sorry I'm the man in front of you.

She knew she was not so innocent herself, but she could never imagine having to do the things he did, much less understand them.

-I'm sorry Sousuke, I just can't...

-It's not a problem.

Those words, like a soothing salve to her burning ears. She let the dam break and let the sobs wrack her body. She felt sorry for him and his miserable life. Hers by comparison was dull and full of happiness, excluding the death of her mother. She never knew someone could be so abused, tormented, as vile as what those people did to Sousuke. And there was more, more he had to tell her, more he had yet to say.

-After you left with Leonard. He continued. I spent 5 days wondering listlessly around my apartment. I finally got the courage to go to school on the 6th day. To be honest with you, I felt like you had betrayed me. Betrayed what we had, the fact that we could do anything together. I wanted to tell you to throw it all away and run away with me, but it was too late by then. I was going to do anything to get you back and I had to tell everyone that I would bring you back. From that day on I looked for leads to Amalgam eventually tracing down an old friend of mine named Rick, he was an AS pilot for an arena sport where ASes fight. It was a place called Namusaku in south east Asia where I met the team of the Crossbow, Michael Lemon, and Nami.

Nami. She had read that name. She knew the sound before it left his lips, it was one of lost love.

-She was the captain of an AS team, her machine was called the Crossbow. Nothing compared to Arbalest or Leviathan, it was an RK-91 but still a good machine.

-Did you love her? She looks away from his face afraid to read the answers written there.

-I can't lie to you Chidori, I suppose in a way I did. I thought about giving up on you, after a few months I couldn't remember things about you, what color was the ribbon in your hair? What wrist did you wear your watch on? Those were distant memories by then. I thought that I might be able to live happily with her, she reminded me a lot of you in ways. She was stubborn and kind. I knew her feelings for me, but never acted on them. But then I let her die. I let her die because I couldn't give up on you Chidori, if I had given up then, I would have never been able to save you. If I would have come out one second earlier I might have saved her, but I would have died in return. He stopped there, a strange lump in his throat.

-Sousuke? It's okay, you don't have to make yourself...

-I do. I want you to know everything, and then after that, you can decide what you want.

-Then I have something to confess to as well. That night, the first night we held hands, that was not the first time that I had met Leonard. When you were recalled, I knew that someone was following me, but I didn't know who. I had to ask a man to a sleazy hotel and pretend like I was going to do things with him... I've never felt so disgusting in my life.

His eyes were wide, he had never heard anything of this side of the story. He knew that Gauron had sent an assassin but he never knew how Kaname had gotten out of that situation.

-I used the stun gun you left me to subdue the man then I handcuffed him to the bathtub. I had to strip down to make sure there were no transmitters on my clothes. I had to wear a ratty hotel bathrobe. I didn't know where you were, I didn't know who was following me, I was so scared Sousuke! She starts to lightly beat on his chest. You weren't there! I ended up finding Wraith thinking she was the one following me, but no it wasn't her. The disguise threw me off, but then out of no where a shot rang out and Wraith was shot,.and I was face to face with a girl and a gun. She tried to shoot me but the chamber jammed so I ran away as fast as I could. I was able to take off my robe and stick it in an obvious hiding place. I then hid out of sight in range of the stun gun and waited for my chance. She did exactly what I predicted and aimed for the robe. Thats when I shocked her. As she lay passed out on the ground, that's when he came. Leonard with two of his Alastors. He killed that girl in cold blood, he had the Alastor strangle her until her eyes literally burst. It was the most horrific scene I have ever seen. He stole _something_ from me that night.

She looked down after that, afraid of Sousuke's rejection. She inadvertently wiped her lips. He knew then what he had taken. A kiss. Probably her first. The rage that welled inside of him was great, if Leonard wasn't already dead he would have killed him. He looked down to the girl in front of him, softly crying and wrapped her in his arms.

-I promise that something of that nature will never happen again as long as I'm alive Chidori.

He softly tilts her head up and looks into her eyes.

-You don't find me disgusting?

-Never. If you can still love me for the things I have done, nothing that you could do could ever compare.

They look into each other's eyes for a long moment. The passion in between them is palpable. Slowly Sousuke leans into Kaname's quivering lips and the feeling between them is electric. Things turn down a sliding slope and they were quickly loosing control. Hands touching, fingers feeling, bodies intertwining, souls connecting.

-Not here.

He sweeps her off her feet, makes it down the hallway in just a few breathless moments, and kicks the door to her bedroom open. He tosses her on the bed hungrily. He closes the door, locks it and turns around and looks down on his prey laying on the bed with open arms. He had never felt so _feeling_ in all his life. Not only senses that could be used for war, killing, surviving,and the most important feeling he had ever felt..._love._


	22. Chapter 22

Her arms were extended out, reaching to him as if to say, "Come with me and I'll show you something marvelous." All he could manage was staring. This was his first time alone with her in this room in two years. The flood of emotions was enough to make him hesitate.

-Chidori?

-Is something wrong Sousuke? Did I do something?

She begins to straighten up when he catches her wrists mid air.

-Please don't think that…

-What is it then, Sousuke?

-I've never had these side effects before when looking at you. I don't know if it's just because I'm weak but my vision seems somehow foggy and my heart is racing, it feels as if I've been drugged. My senses are dull and I feel drunk at the sight of you, what is this Chidori?

-Hehehe, Sousuke that's what it feels like to love someone, to want to be with them so bad it hurts. Your chest hurts too right?

-Affirmative how did you know?

-Because I feel it too, right here. She places her hands together with his and places a hand on each heart. We are sharing the same feeling; our hearts are aching to be connected.

Sousuke then forces Kaname back down onto the bed. Kissing her softly, then cocking his head to one side he inquires:

-How do we endeavor in this mission?

-Ehhhh?! I thought kinda- ya know- you'd take the lead on this…. She trailed off burning red and wheedling her fingers together.

-It's not that I don't know how the act is preformed; I grew up in tents around murderers, terrorists, and rapists but I don't think I want to do it like that, plus you'd probably kill me first.

She broke out in a fit of laughter as terrible a truth as that was she knew that only Sousuke could say something like that with a deadpan face.

- That and the only other person I have to refer to is Kurz Webber.

At this Kaname laughs thinking about the always-perverse blonde they thought they had lost, but like the cockroach he is he's hard to kill. They rolled over each other on the bed while she was laughing.

-Well I suppose we can start like this. Kaname's eyes grew heavy at the sight of him. She traced a finger across the cross shaped scar on his chin.

-This is what saved me from changing the world. You were there, but it wasn't you. It was someone I didn't know because he didn't have this. She places a soft kiss on his jawline. I'm also sorry, I could have given you a better life Sousuke, but because I'm selfish I chose to have what I really wanted. You.

-Chidori you have been the guiding force in my life since I met you, I have always felt it was more than just a mission to protect you. Something I thought I had lost stirred the moment you hit me with your harisen the first time and scolded me, but then you were also kind to me and were just trying to help me adjust to the new culture and life as a high school student while always trying my best.

His confession prompted Kaname to confess that even on the first day she felt the same sort of attraction.

-Kyoko was the first person to point it out to me. She said 'If he annoys you so much then why don't we change the subject.' I hadn't realized I'd been talking about you all day. She sighs at the memory. Poor miss Kagurazaka you caused her so much trouble from the beginning. At least she found her happy ending. Hey Sousuke?

-Nani?

-Do you think we'll have our own happy ending?

-Affirmative.

-Do you think we'll have kids?

At the actual thought of having children Sousuke went rigid. Every muscle tensed and he had flash backs to his own childhood. The fear, the constant fight, struggling to live day to day; in Afghanistan he would nearly burn to death in the desert by day and freeze to death by night. He couldn't fathom a fun and happy childhood full of whimsy and imagination, with loving parents and friends. He imagined rules and strict discipline. Kaname could see the nightmares playing across his steel gaze, the 1000-yard stare. She tightened her grip on him.

-Chidori, I'm not sure I would be what you call a good father. I have no concept of family or life without struggle…

-Sousuke… she cut him off. I hate to tell you this but there is no such thing as a perfect father, there is no manual to raising children you just do what you feel is right.

-I did make a promise to Mao though before I left for Merida.

-What was that?

-I promised that if I made it back alive I would put down my weapons and try to live a peaceful life. Now that Mithril is disbanded I no longer have any contractual obligations to fulfill. Kalinin before he died... he said he was trying to teach me one more lesson. That I wasn't cut out for this kind of work, I was a lamb raised by wolves. I don't know if I believe it but I would like to think that maybe I can live peacefully side by side with you.

-I think that can be arranged.

She then straddles Sousuke and curls up on top of him. He wraps his arms around her lithe form. She can feel his muscles under his thin t-shirt so strong and safe. She looks into his eyes once more and the urge to be one with him courses through her veins like sweet nectar. She can feel their bodies reacting under the careful caresses and kisses she can feel her nipples beginning to harden as she feels his manhood begin to bulge. Soon the kissing and touching turns from sweet to passionate, light fleeting kissing becoming longer and more sensual- tongues darting in and out of each others mouths, hands exploring parts of their bodies never explored before. Sousuke's hand cupping the supple firmness of her ass eliciting an audible moan from Kaname's lips, he had never experienced such desire. She suddenly sat bolt upright.

-Sousuke take off your shirt.

He did as she commanded, but then a sudden horror struck look crossed her face.

-Oh God Sousuke… She put one hand to her mouth and the other to his abdomen where a fairly fresh scar covered a large part of his abs and stomach. She traced her fingers across the raised skin noticing other fairly new scars from the year of fighting.

-It's okay Kaname, I'm here- I'm fine-

He kisses her forehead gingerly putting his hands on either side of her face, stroking her cheek with his thumb.

-All wounds heal Chidori, but nothing in this world could replace you.

Tears begin to well in her eyes.

-Baka, sometimes you're so sweet you say just the right thing and you don't even mean to.

The kissing begins again slowly not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable or scared in any way. The passion once again begins to rise as Kaname kisses his neck lightly nipping, licking and sucking as she went. His hand wandered up the back of her shirt feeling her petal soft skin, he felt the straps of her bra and wondered if it would be okay to touch her ample breasts. First he put his hands around her waist under her shirt slowly tracing his calloused fingers over her ribs. Her flesh puckered as a result. He was enjoying every sensation but was afraid to go any further. Almost as if she was reading his mind Kaname's hand closed over his and guided it up to her left breast. He lightly traced his fingertips over the soft flesh and his index finger came to rest on the yielding zenith of her nipple.

-Oh Sousuke! She moaned into his ear.

-Kaname since I have disrobed would you umm… do the same?

-Heh, all right solider I think I've kept you waiting long enough.

She removes the ribbon on her uniform slowly and teasingly. She sensually takes off her blouse letting Sousuke bask in her body. After a moment of awe Sousuke dives into her soft bosom squeezing, grasping, encircling, kissing. Before he could stop himself he has unclasped her white lace satin bra and was slipping the straps down her slim shoulders. As the bra came off she reflexively covers her chest, but Sousuke grabs her wrists gently.

-Don't. You've seen my scars and love me still; you are the most dazzling woman I have ever met.

Her resistance is shattered as he sits up slightly to lay his head on her chest arms wrapped around her like a child clinging to his mother, pausing in the heat of the moment. She feels something wet roll down the curve of her breast. She wraps her arms around his neck and head tightly.

-Sousuke?

-Kaname at this moment I am truly happy for the first time in my life, arrigatou.

-I hate to tell you this Sousuke, but I think you're going to be even happier by the end of tonight.

She gently releases her grasp and pushes him back down on the bed. She traces kisses down his chest pausing only to tease each of his nipples with her tongue and teeth. Lower and lower licking and kissing blowing soft puffs of cool air. She manages a quick glace upward as she reaches the fly of his pants. His eyes are closed beads of sweat running down his face a film of sweat beginning to cover his chest. She undoes the top button and she can feel his manhood begin to grow and the hands on her shoulders slightly tremble. There is a hook and one more button on the inside to undo before her task is halfway complete. She slowly undoes the zipper, hooks her thumbs into his belt loops and begins to pull down his slacks. He lifts his hips to comply too the tugging making it easier for her to pull them off. He was in his boxers the only thing keeping in his member was a button on his boxers. Her hand wanders up his thigh to the one thing on a man she had never touched or seen. At the first touch he arches his back moaning loudly. She then stands up straight and undoes the button and zipper on her skirt leaving her in only a pair of simple white underwear. He sits up then and flips her so she is on her back on the bed. His hand is drawn to the small triangle of fabric slightly damp from her arousal. His fingertips touch the dampness and a pleasing keening began in Kaname's throat. It was as if he had done this all his life, he used his thumb to rub her clit and the rest of his fingers set about fondling her lips and entrance.

-Oh Sousuke! More!

-Yes ma'am.

His fingers slipped under the elastic of her soaking panties feeling the soft bare skin underneath. He reaches her slit and begins his ministrations once again. He has one breast in his mouth and the other in his hand undulating her pert breasts. After a few minutes of rubbing and teasing her curiously inserts one finger into her vagina.

-YES!

He begins to lightly pump his finger in and out of her opening, trying different things as he does so, twisting his finger side to side, making a come here motion with his finger inside of her. She had never felt anything like it before like a wave of pleasure surging through her body. Her hips began to move as if on their own grinding up and down against his finger.

-Ahhh oh god yes… Please more! Put another finger in me quickly before I die!

A second finger quickly joins the first. The pumping and writhing becomes more fervent as Kaname begins to pant heavily her muscles quivering.

-That's it! Right there! She reaches her first climax in escalation culminating in a wail of pleasure unlike anything she had experienced before.

Her juices ran down his fingers to his palm and when the convulsions finally stopped he removed his fingers and put them one by one in his mouth savoring the flavor. Her taste was pleasingly sweet and pungent like a delicacy. Her chest was heaving up and down but she wanted him to feel the same pleasure she did. As he leaned in to kiss her she took the opportunity to catch him off guard and flip him underneath her.

-Your turn sergeant.

She unbuttons the fly of his boxers releasing some of the pressure on his dick. She tentatively wraps her digits one at a time around his penis and gently eases the unit out of its holding place. As she pulled it became evident that he was well armed in both length and girth indeed, it also curved up in a pleasing sort of way. She licked her palm and gently begins fondling his penis moving her thumb around the tip, firmly gripping his shaft she begins to move up and down. He grips her shoulders tight audibly moaning her name. The enticing sound excites her and she leans down to tease her tongue against his throbbing cock. She licks around the head of his circumcised member and to the base of the shaft. Her hand instinctively cups his balls and begins to massage lightly. Soon the licking turns into sucking and once she is sufficiently satisfied as to the wetness of his cock did she say:

-I need you inside me.

It's Sousuke's turn to flip Kaname over positioning himself above her entrance.

-Are you sure this is ok? I heard it hurts the first time.

-As long as it's you Sousuke I know I'll be fine. She kissed him at that.

Slowly he begins to push inside her, the wetness helping against the resistance. Finally he felt her maidenhead stroking her cheek he said:

-It's only going to hurt for a moment, I love you Kaname.

He pressed his hips slowly and firmly against hers until he felt the tare of the skin. She let out a slight yelp and he began to quickly withdraw, but her arms wrapped tighter around him.

-Please keep going Sousuke.

The pain didn't last long and soon waves of sensation wracked her deep in her core. He began a slow cadence letting her get used to the feeling of having him inside her and he needed to get used to the feeling as well lest he disappoint her.

-Deeper! She urged.

He then placed each of her legs over his shoulders and began the slow pumping once again. Her moans became louder as his strokes came slightly faster. Her eyes were closed but he couldn't help but look at this beautiful girl. Her fingernails were leaving slight traces down his back and it only intensified the sensation. Deeper. Harder. Faster. The grinding became frantic on both sides the yearning reaching a fever pitch.

-S o u su ke I'm going to…

-Ah Kaname me too…

He was deep inside of her when she reached her orgasm causing him in turn to reach his. He lay heavily on top of her after their spasms subsided gingerly pulling out of her and rolling over to lie beside her. She curled up around him his arm around her shoulder and the other behind his head. He looks over to see a warm content smile under heavy lidded eyes. He kissed the top of her head and let out a sigh.

-You were right Chidori.

-About what?

-_This_ is the happiest moment of my life.

-Mmm, mine too Sousuke.

In a few minutes they were both fast asleep.


	23. Chapter 23

-_Kweh Kaname it's time to get up! Kweh!_

Sousuke promptly grabs his glock17 with his eyes closed and shoots the cawing rooster right between its plastic eyes. BANG!

Kaname nearly falls out of bed the loud sound shocking her awake from her deep slumber. Sousuke however rolls back over glock in hand and goes back to a peaceful sleep.

-SO-U-SU-KE! She reaches for her harisen propped next to her nightstand.

As she raises her arm she realizes she is completely nude and he is staring at her with a deep blush spread across his cheeks. She snatches up the sheets from around her waist to cover her exposed breasts.

-DON'T LOOK!

-After yesterday how could I not?

She rears back to give him a good punch and just as she's about to connect, he dodges in and steals a kiss.

-Pervert.

It's then that she realizes that she's not the only one completely nude. It's her turn to look, his body was in pique physical form with well defined abs and pecks the only thing marring his perfect physique was a plethora of scars from his years in combat. It was his turn to tease her.

-Hentai.

-Geez I wasn't even looking that much!

-I would say you were undressing me with your eyes but since I am already disrobed I um…

-Sousuke, are you trying to make a _dirty _joke?

-I've been told me humor needs an upgrade, but yes I was.

Kaname starts sniggering, then chuckling, followed by a burst of chortling, before the next breath it was a full rolling laughter arms wrapped around her sides; after a fit of that she places her arm around Sousuke.

-Oh Sousuke! You… you… BAKA-INU!

There was suddenly a strange sound coming out of the always -serious sergeant. Kaname's eyes go wide as she hears for the first time ever Sousuke's genuine heartfelt laughter. It warmed her to the core to hear it and to see that he had finally let his guard down for once. She places her head against his chest and her arms around his back. She feels complete with him by her side once again. It was like the last two years were just a horrible nightmare and waking up here with him like this is how it should have been all along.

-Kaname, what time is it?

-Half past ten I think, why?

-Wow we've slept nearly 24 hours.

-We were both exhausted.

-Affirmative, I've never slept so long in my life.

-You mean besides the year you spent asleep in a coma?

-Yes besides that, I don't remember it so it still does not seem real.

Kaname yawns and stretches noticing the little red light blinking on her answering machine.

-Damn we must have slept hard for neither of us to hear the phone ring. She mutters.

She absently grabs her bathrobe and pads across the room to play the message.

_-Kaname it's your father Shunya…_

_-Dad you don't have to tell her your name I doubt she's forgotten it!_

_-All right, Ayame that's enough for now._

_-We're flying in to see you, we'll be there around 10:45 hope you are doing well. Bye dear._

_-BYE NEE-CHAN!_

-OH NO SOUSUKE! GET UP GET DRESSED NOW!

She turns around with panic written all over her face but he is nowhere to be seen. She then hears the familiar release of the safety and runs to the living room to find Sousuke stark naked glock pointed at her front door.

-Sousuke no!

Just then the latch on the lock releases and the door swings open to reveal Shunya and Ayame. BANG! The glock goes off striking the doorframe next to Shunya's temple, he stares at the hole in the wood sweat pouring down his face jaw almost to the floor. His jaw actually hits the floor when he looks to where his other daughter Ayame is pointing, there is Kaname naked except for a bathrobe straddling a completely naked and vicious looking man wrestling a gun from his grip.

-SOUSUKE CALM DOWN IT'S JUST MY FAMILY! Geez you'll pull out a gun on a fly if it sets off a motion sensor! NOW GET UP AND GO PUT SOME PANTS ON!

Shunya's jaw drops completely through the floor when it's revealed that Kaname actually knows the naked man and is acting as if this is an everyday occurrence. His briefcase and luggage long forgotten he storms into the apartment turning redder and redder at each step. At the sound of the angry footsteps Kaname whips around and shouts:

-OH NO I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT FROM YOU NOW! I've been kidnapped by terrorists, brainwashed, nearly destroyed the world and managed to make it back alive thanks to _that man there! NOT TO MENTION I'VE BEEN BACK A WHOLE YEAR! _Have you even bothered to call and see how I am?! You just show up here when it's convenient for you. Well just now wasn't particularly good for ME. Now I'm going to go take a shower and Sousuke will be out shortly and you be nice to him daddy… if it wasn't for him not only me- the whole world would be gone.

She turns around and marches into her bathroom passing a stunned Sousuke on her way giving him a kiss. Shunya and Sousuke are both dumbfounded. Sousuke quickly retreats into Kaname's bedroom Shunya notices and not the guest.

-Hey dad? Don't cha think that guy was sorta dreamy?

-You are never to call that man dreamy.

-_I wonder how old he is? He looked like a soldier but couldn't have been more than Kaname's age._

-That's the guy that saved Kaname's life dad!

-HIM?!

-Sergeant Sousuke Sagara of the SRT unit, ex-mercenary personnel for the antiterrorist organization known as Mithril and Miss Chidori's personal body guard for the last 3 years, sir.

Sousuke, now dressed in his fatigues, reports to Shunya at attention.

-So Sagara-kun what were you doing in my daughters bedroom naked at this hour? He huffed.

Sweat began pouring down his face and he had no answer that would really satisfy her father. He knew he had to respond and started to say something when Ayame spoke up for him.

-I'm sure he has his reasons father. Plus I don't think Kaname would like you prying into her private life either. So you're him hu? Thank you for saving my sister!

It was the last thing Sousuke was expecting her to say. From what Kaname had said about her sister she was supposed to be a nosy brat, whatever that meant. She paced around him a few times as if sizing him up.

-Well he doesn't really fit the image I had of Nee-chan's type, but if he can put up with Kaname then he must be a good guy! Dad! Don't be rude! Thank him properly!

-Uh yes, thank you for saving my daughter on numerous occasions I am deeply indebted to you. I know that my work keeps me away from her and calling isn't always possible with the time distance but please continue looking after her.

-Sir yes sir! That is my mission and my top priority, you're daughters safety is the reason I can keep going. Sousuke looked as if he would keel over from fright at any moment.

Looking at his soldier like physique, as well as the cross shaped scar along his jaw he looked every bit the battle hardened soldier but seeing him sweating balls over simply meeting him, he had to laugh.

-Haha! At ease soldier! You seem like a fine young man indeed! As far as I'm concerned you're a member of the family now… as long as you can keep that trigger-happy finger of yours under control.

-I will try my hardest to live up to your expectations and uphold my duties sir! He salutes Shunya.

The hairdryer had turned off during this conversation without either of them noticing. Kaname listened through the bathroom door smiling to her-self as Sousuke reached the end of his salute. She quickly changes into a pink cowl neck sweater and a pair of jeans. After it was all on did she pull the length of her hair out of her sweater, attaching the usual ribbon at the end of her hair. She then returns to the living room to find her family grilling Sousuke.


End file.
